Offshore Rebel Adventures in Thailand

A busy time!!

2012-01-26T01:02:00.001-08:00

It's been a hectic 8 days which have seen me in Cambodia, Laos and Myanmar in my attempts to find a big Mekong catfish. The Jai joined me for a few days of sight seeing along the mountains between Myanmar and Thailand...one time Bandit Country, the mecca of the south east Asian Opium trade before dramatic changes took place in the 1980's onwards and the locals were persuaded it would be better for their health if they grew tea and coffee instead!!

Thailand is stuffed full of fascinating sights, lakes, mountains, rivers, temples, many different ethnic minority 'tribes' and cultures. As Thailand is a long country running from 20 degrees North right down to 5 degrees North, the temperature varies enormously. Our fishing today was taking place in temperatures of 34 degrees C. 5 days ago, right up in the north of the country, I was fishing in just 8 degrees C.

Anyhow, these next days of fishing had been carefully worked out thanks to our Game Fishing Captain, John Pearce, in Phuket who knows anyone in the fishing world worth knowing. He had put me onto our guide, Gob, and Gob..altho' we didn't see much of him in his disguise during the day...was excellent and worked really hard to keep us catching right through the day.

The first lake was a good hour's drive north of Bangkok and contained a variety of monster fish including carp to 50kg (yeah....over 100lb!), arapima to 150kg (????what???) and catfish to 100kg. We had come for the catfish....and that's exactly what we caught.

These fish are tough. We needed heavy weight spinning rods and bait runners which were loaded with 30lb mono to 60lb braided hook lengths set just below bait cages. The hook wasn't baited...it just hung free beneath the rice bait ball.

The cats fight with agressive resistance and can be hard to control. The main problem is encroaching on another angler's swim or not being able to stop the fish going under the wooden pylons that support the fishing piers.

In the first photo you can see the houses that you can rent. At £40 per day and able to sleep up to 4, it's a better bet to spend a couple of days on this lake rather than having to travel as we did. We had been warned the journey back could take twice as long because of the Bangkok traffic (the warnings were correct!)

Now, you all know that Thai people can squat all day long with no ill effect. Here I am practicing the semi squat...which is, I can assure you, painful. The reason I am in this daft position is that my 30lb catfish has hurled across the lake towards me and gone belting under the bloody pier trying to take me with it. It took a good 15 minutes to get this buggar back out....not funny when it's a tad warm and the sun is beating on your back. You will also see that The Jai insists I look smart when I am fishing and had only packed my long trousers....bloody great!

Anyhow...with magnificent dexterity...(Gob, our guide handhauled the damn thing out) I coaxed the monster to the net.

Meanwhile our Bertie had more than got the hang of these rascals. The first one (well over 20kg) hurt him. Now Bert's a strong lad, but it's all about technique and making the rod do the work. These fish really are nuts and definitely on drugs...if you bully them they just get angry. What's that Blazing Saddles phrase...'Don't shoot Mungo...he just gets angry'. Wel, give these critters a bit too much grunt to start with and they don't respond too happily either!

Gary has gone over to the Dark Side. He is now a full time Commercial Fisherman back in sunny Weymuff. He doesn't bother with a rod...just reaches in and pulls 'em out. (What? Mungo's mate, you say? Dunno what you mean).

Meanwhile....my next bloody fish had also gone back round the piles. I get the feeling Gary's technique is a lot easier. They certainly put a LOT of pressure on your back when they're jammed underneath you....

Bertie started and finished the day with the biggest fish. We caught at least 10 each. We lost count. So, 30 fish (at least) at an average 20kg = 600kg = 1300lb approx...well, that's pretty impressive for a 6 hour session using just two rods between the three of us.

We met a lot of very fanatical visiting anglers around the lake. Two German lads were on a ten day fishing trip...and then were going back to Germany for two months before returning in April for a 60 day freshwater fishing marathon all round north Thailand. I got some good hints and places from them to go....we are just scratching the surface...there is SO MUCH excellent fishing here to explore. Gary, Bert and I have already got next year's first place in mind. There's a big dam across the River Kwai (as in the film) at Kanchaburi to the north west of Bangkok. Gob has described the snakeheads that live there. We are hoping to do a three day stint there and stay in one of the floating bungalows on the massive lake.....

Meanwhile Steve 'el Crusty Thorne has already ear marked a three day stint at Gillams fishery over to the east of Phuket for Dec this year...and that is definitely a world class venue. You know, chaps, it IS all about how much money you are prepared to pay as freshwater fishing is not cheap. Keeping a big lake stocked with quality big fish is an expensive business....so the angler MUST pay or it just won't work.

Saying that though...we shall be off to our lake in Phuket in the next day or so...and that's £20 for the day. We're also booked to go sea fishing tomorrow evening with our favourite longtail boat Thai Captain....so it's all busy busy....

We finished our day off in the lake's tackle shop!! I mean...look at it. And the gear is real top quality Shimano stuff with plenty of fixed spool reels in the £600++ bracket. Some of the top Shimano bait runners were well over a £Grand. We, miserable paupers that we are, purchased 3 sets of tackle for our next day's baramundi fishing at £150 for the lot!

The Jai laughs at us and calls us 'Keeneo' which apparantly means 'Tight Old Gits' or some such equivalent.

I have many more stories to relate...but I have a feeling the next few days are going to dominate the past ones..Happy Days and Keep Fishing.

Baramundi!!

2012-01-26T00:23:00.000-08:00

We had been warned that the baramundi fishing took place in a very exposed area well to the north of where we fished the previous day. When we met our guides Gob (yeah; I know...you all think I make these names up) and Tinkle (see! Well...that was their names...so there) we could tell we were in for some serious heat. Gob and Tinkle were dressed like members of the Taliban and we never got to see Tink's face all day...

Yep; it WAS hot exposed and hot.....but at least there was the beginnings of a five star resort for us to shelter under when the need arose for drink breaks....water only in this case!

There were 50 lakes set in the middle of no-where. They are breeding ponds for the baramundi so, from an angling point of view, it's cheating. The Thai owner is on to something good here....the baramundi are being bred for the Bangkok resturants with each lake netting (get it?!) £20,000 per year. That makes a cool £1 mill. And, as a bit of a bonus for his workers, he allows a LITTLE bit of fishing (we were the only three anglers allowed that day...ah, such influence one has) to take place in one of the lakes where the fish are just about ready to be taken to market.

It cost us £45 each for the day's fishing, plus tips and taxi (taxi had to stay with us all day as we were so far from anywhere) and the fishing gear we had to buy...so it ain't cheap...£100 each approx...but what an experience. (I put the financial details in for you lovely readers so you can get an idea what dosh you need to bring when you come for your holiday here with me!!!). Resembling bass, baramundi are manic fighters. These lakes were only a couple of metres deep so the fish leapt well clear of the water in their efforts, often successful, to throw the lures.

Obviously there's no tackle shop around so we had to provide our own gear. We bought, under our guide's advice, very light Shimano spinning rods with small Shimano fixed spool reels loaded with 20lb green braid. Because of the power of these fish we needed 60lb mono leader tied to the braid with the correct tapered bimini twist leader knot (you know the one lads, that one you all practise tying regularly in the evenings).

The leaders were tied to a variety of lures, mainly rapalas. Some were sinking and others were more like poppers. It was nice to try a couple of different types. But, with so many fish within a contained area, we couldn't go wrong. I guess we must have had 60 between us...maybe more. The fish were mainly in the 4kg range which is the size the restaurants want?

Here we are then, the three Musketeers with three of our hard fighting fish. All the fish were released as they were due to be shipped out later in the week.

OK...there was no challenge in this as regards the actually tracking down of the quarry and fishing in remote, untamed and natural surroundings BUT we caught stacks of manic fish on as light as tackle as we were advised. A brilliant if extremely hot day. The secret was just to be sensible and get in the shade now and then, drink plenty of water and stick a few cubes of ice under your hat!!

Phuket Game Park

2012-01-09T23:05:00.000-08:00

Steve El Crusty Thorne and Capt'n Whittall of Weymouth's latest excursion to the Phuket Game Park resulted in the Capt'n (me) attracting hoards of adoring crowds and small children to view the biggest catfish ever recorded (I lie) from this water. This fine 16kg catfish fell to a deftly presented bit of bread squeezed onto a size 14 (hmmm...dunno how sizes are worked out over here....looked like a size 2 to me) thick shanked hook to a 30lb braid trace. The running leger rig incorporated a bait cage with a good handful of bread/fruit/stuff crammed into it. The filled 'bait cage' acts as the weight to cast the bait into the middle of the lake which is apparently 10 metres deep.

This was though, take note Mr Derby and other followers of the legendary Crusty's angling exploits, Mr Thorne's day. His Siamese carp was just on 19kg (over 40lb!) and was the biggest fish of the day and the heaviest to be caught from the lake so far this year....well, it IS the 10th Jan already!

This has made Steve's lake fishing something very special....a 40lb plus freshwater fish is a very fine catch.

And one more before it was released...to show the justifiably ecstatic angler enjoying a final wet wriggle against his toned and tanned body before the fish was returned.

That's the end of Steve's fishing for this holiday. The next fishing adventure will be when I meet Gary and Bert in Bangkok on 22nd Jan. I have arranged for a Thai fishing guide to take us to two waters to the north of the Capital. Our first venue contains some monster catfish...up to 350lb!!!! (I've seen the photographic evidence) Day 2 will be fishing for baramundi using spinning tackle. I am assured to expect anything between 20 to 50 fish each in the 5kg to 12kg range per day. I'm going to invest in a couple of rods/reels for this second day as then we'll have some tackle for the lake in Phuket. It costs quite a high percentage of the overall daily cost in Phuket if we hire rods....so this may be a way to reduce the outlay a bit.

I have made enquiries at Gillhams Fishery over in Krabi. These venues are not cheap...Gillhams is £100 per day (approx) but it has to be regarded as one of the top freshwater venues in the world now. I know that's the sort of stupid claim made by many venues or in various tourist guides...but in the case of Gillhams, it is definitely an accurate description.

It seems like Gary and Bert won't have time for my proposed trip there after the Bangkok lakes....so, I can see me going there on my own at the end of February.

The point of this drivel though is to emphasise just how much amazing freshwater fishing there is available. For you keen anglers, there is just so much on offer....what a winter's holiday you could have here!!

Rawai Sea Gypsy Fish Market

2012-01-09T18:02:00.000-08:00

One very special treat is to drive down to Rawai Fish Market and wait for the boats to come in and unload their days catch. Here's the Jai and Om (Bristol Faery's missus) waiting to pounce. Those gals argue every gramme of fish down to the lowest Baht...the poor old Sea Gypsy fishermen must dread it went the Thai women descend on them (mmm?)

The fish are landed and spread out across a number of family stalls right on the sea's edge. There's a huge variety of species witha few reasonable sized fish...these fish come from 20 miles offshore along the 150 metere drop offs and are caught in large 'fish cages'...a bit like a big square lobster pot....the 'cages' are hauled each ay.

Shell fish is not cheap anywhere in the world....so it's good to have the ferocious bartering prowess of Om in particular....

These lobsters are extremely tasty...much sweeter than our home back home but no claws...well, scraggy little claws...the meat is all in the body.

Crusty Steve likes to wander around and look lkike he's in control of the bartering....here's his 'How much??? You can get stuffed' look...bugga me but he's scarey, ain't he? If you were a weather beaten, sun baked Sea Gypsy Commercial Fisheman's wife...you'd be scared of him wouldn't you????

Anyhow, with 4 kilo of tiger prawns, several lobsters, a dose of crabs, a gurt plateful of green lipped mussels and a selection of fresh fish all bough back to the resturant opposite the fish stall for cooking....the gang set to it. It may be seen that our own group expands somewhat during such occasions as Horst (our esteemed EFSA World Presidente) and his family always seem to appear when there's a chance of a bit of free scram about.

Khao Sok National Park

2012-01-08T05:00:00.000-08:00

The Khao Sok National Park is about 150 km North of Phuket. A massive part of it was dammed and flooded in 1982 creating a lake of 165 sq km and, as it was filled, over 100 islands were formed.

Many groups of Thai people an visiting tourists enjoy the peace and beauty of the surroundings and enjoy swimming in the freshwater which is much cooler than the sea.

There are 8 'floating' villages scattered throughout the area where visitors can enjoy a night or two on the lake.

The accommodation is simple but the houses have the basic facilities and there's a restaurant and bar on hand.

For the adventurous types (The Jai and Me for example) there are kayaks to go off exploring in and you can take along a mask and snorkle to have a bit of an investigation into the underwater scenery alongside the sheer sided 'Hongs'. There's plenty of fish in the lake so nice to take a couple of rods as well.

There's a longtail boat present to take us out on evening trips in the hope of seeing a few wild animals...we are always promised tigers, boar, deer etc....I don't think there's much chance of that with all the racket and laughter going on in the boat as we 'creep silently' along.....

But it's all about scenery and the chance to take some memorable photo's and collect togther some unforgettable memories.

Janey (mad as a box of frogs) Thorne has no idea at all how to use her camera and is a happy snapper...although she tells me 'she knows how to compose' a picture (ha ha haaa).

The great thing with digital photography is that anyone can take 4, 273 shots per day day and the chances are one shot will turn out ok. Well, here we have an example of that very phenomenon...with Janey ending up with two very nice photo's plus the usual stuff...

The park is an amazing place....if you are into photography, then you've got to fit a visit into your holiday here...

Early morning mist falling down the mountains to the lake and across our floating village.....stunning!

New Year's Eve

2012-01-01T22:46:00.000-08:00

There's so much on offer New Year's Eve in Phuket that you are spoilt for choice. We decided to much about in Chalong...have a few drinks around the bars...have a few bites to eat and wait until the midnight hour's fireworks extravaganzas. Thailand LOVES fireworks so we knew we were in for a treat.

The question is..where was the best venue to go to see all the multitude of displays...

Anyhow, off to Chalong. Our little group now compromising Crusty Steve and wife Janey plus nephew Ali who is a teacher in Bangkok, Lothario Keith, Wad and Coz (who have recently arrived) Jai and me....a nice group of partygoers to swell the Chalong Town ranks.

Here we are at Guy's Bar. Guy is son of Colonel David who Jai and I had Xmas dinner with. Guy offers a 'girlie free' zone which is actually very refreshing....and makes a point of creating an 'All things English' atmosphere with sports TV (cricket, football and snooker) along with Cheese and Wine afternoons and pub quizzes. This actually works very well as, believe it or not, many ex-Pat chaps enjoy an Oasis of good old British calm against the more usual bars where you are pounced on by a scantily clad, dark haired beauty within seconds of arriving.....mad you say??...well, not really...enough's enough and all that.

A short walk down to Chalong seafront and free eats were on offer at all the seaside bars....very pleasant. Here we have the Happy Jai and her Thai lady friend Khun Leck who owns the colourful Tamarine Bar and her husband Petro from Sweden. This bar has been a firm favourite over the past couple of weeks with its impressive offering of Thai dishes at very cheap (£10 for dinner) prices.

My little camera cannot handle firework display shots...but at midnight the whole seafront is lit up with the displays provided by every bar in Chalong...and there's at least 30 bars....so PLENTY of fireworks.

And now are little group is gathering before the post midnight split with the 'younger members' heading off to a massive beach party (30,000 people!) taking place on Karon Beach about 4 miles away. We saw our younger friends at about 4pm on New Years Day when they finally surfaced...

We older personages remained for a few more drinks in a mature and stately fashion before waddling off back home...

Yo Ho...all good fun here in Chalong.

Happy New Year to you all!!!

Diving

2011-12-31T17:57:00.000-08:00

It's been windy here virtually every day since I arrived in early December. For many (sunbathers, kite surfers, culture vultures, walkers etc), a bit of breeze is very welcome but not for us chaps who want to go sea fishing. The seas have been too uncomfortable for inshore fishing from the longtail boats and too rough 70 miles off for our planned Similan Island trips.

This means I have been doing a lot of diving...like, every day! At the moment I have Neil as my 'private student' and now Coz and Wad from Dorset have arrived. Yesterday was Coz' first sea dive after our first day spent in the pool learning the basics....

Here we have Neil posing on his second sea dive. This was a particularly good dive. We had moved out onto the sand clear of the coral reef to practice navigation and bouyancy control. A bit of current was moving so we drifted a bit further away from the reef than I'd planned so we continued our dive over sand in the hope of seeing a few stingrays. We were rewarded with spotting 8 stingrays of varying sizes....excellent.

Wad (Mark, from Weymouth) has done a bit of diving in Koa Toa and UK. He has dived with my illustrious son Tom around Weymouth and Portland. Thus, as can be seen here, he is very able to be silly underwater. It actually takes a good deal of bouyancy control to be silly in a controlled manner...so, well done to Wad for showing us how it should be done.

This was Coz's first dive in the sea. The first 'drop down' from the surface is always the most worrying and one that will never be forgotten. Coz (short for Corinne!) was great. No probs at all....a gentle descent and then into a nice forward position so we could take the first steps at buoyancy control and dive profile.

Despite it being her first dive, Coz easily managed an hour and we surfaced with her having plenty of air left whilst her acrobatic boyfriend, Wad, was sucking on the final molecules in his tank. It just shows that with calmness and control, the dive can last a long time. The great thing about this Kata reef is that there is so much to see. It is crammed with life and thousands of fish with many different species including a resident school of young barracuda that are often completely surrounding you...it's an impressive sight. And everything can be viewed from the safety of the sandy sea bottom that runs alongside the reef. Perfect. As our trainee divers become more confident (the last thing I want is for our 'trainees' to wack themselves on the coral reef) then we can start to explore further into the reef itself.

Today is the 1st Jan 2012. Our UK friends should be tucked up in bed now (it is 02.17 your time) after a good session of celebration. Here it is 09.17...Jai has gone to water the garden at her house and to visit the Temple. I am here 'writing' and waiting for the first appearances from our 6 guests from upstairs...who knows when that might be??

No diving for a couple of days now. Today we aim to go to the Rawai Sea Gypsy Village for a fresh fish, prawn BBQ lunch. Sadly, this will be our friend Keith's last lunch as he has to return to UK tomorrow. Keith has systematically broken the hearts of the young ladies of Chalong and has actually been banned from several bars because the ladies are fighting over him and it is causing serious disharmony in their ranks!! Ha Ha, what a laugh...being banned cos the female bar staff get too upset when you walk in!! Can you imagine that happening in UK???

We have a lake fishing trip planned for the 3rd and will be joined by several other UK anglers who are staying in nearby Kata. On the 4th we (Neil, Neil's wife Jan, Wad, Coz, me) are booked to go diving all day out on a longtail boat with our local skipper, Captain Tawan.

It's all go here in sunny Phuket.....it could be YOU next Xmas or next year!!! Get that holiday planning on the go!!

Happy 2012!!!

Christmas Day

2011-12-31T03:47:00.000-08:00

I have been berated for my slackness in maintaining The Blog over the last few days by my faithful Blog Followers. Apologies...this has been due to the time spend chasing Jai through Chalong Town on her nightly drunken outings....she is a real scamp at this time of year!

And so, Xmas Day, The Jai and I were fought over by our neighbours ex- sub-mariner Malcome and his charming Ukrainian Pole Dancing finalist wife Carol, who comes from some county called Devon, and Lt Colonel David and his wife Gai. Gai, as you all know, means chicken. Thai ladies are called after such creatures on a regular basis...especially useful when they become old broilers.

We (The Jai) and I had been ordered to the Colonel's house this year having hob nobbed with the 'low life' at Malcome's last Christmas. But first we nipped into Malcome's so Jai could see the splendid Xmas Tree and presents that had been prepared for the guests.

It ain't easy to get the 'stuff' required to put on a fine Xmas spread over here....and a massive effort had gone into both Xmas Dinners.

Anyhow, we entered the Colonel's superb Town House and were impressed to see four Thai 'servants'...well, that's what the Colonel calls them and how he refers to them when he's shouting at them for being useless...slaving over a selection of meats (turkey, hams, porks, sausages wrappd in bacon) and at least six traditional veg including the despised Brussel Sprouts (yuck....is there anyone who honestly like these fart inducing, smelly geen balls???) roast and mashed tatties, and all sorts of
stuffings and jellies. I mean; it WAS amazing......

Upstairs we were greeted by the delightful Gai (chicken, remember) who showed us to our named seats (the seating plan being carefully constructed so that the ex-Pat men were at one end of the table in order that they might talk about important stuff such as golf and fishing whilst the Thai ladies (wives and partners) were as far away as possible at the other end where they good gossip at how extremely lucky they were to have encroached into polite European Society and who had the biggest car, shiniest ring, most dresses etc...you know the sort of stuff.

Ah, the pleasures of a well presented table under the formidable and ordered control of a man, Colonel David, who believes in the maintainance of standards. Excellent.

It was a womderful dinner and fascinating conversation. I must point out that I met a gentleman named Peter at dinner who is an International Marine Lawyer and Broker. It is he who has just managed (after 2 full years of negotiations) to sell off Condor 10 in Weymouth Harbour for a measley £6.5 million to the South Koreans. So, maybe Condor 10 has gone....but if not, it will be when the weather allows.

This will come as a massive shock to a certain member of the Weymouth Commercial fishing fleet whose own boat has been known to attempt to mate with Condor 10.

It was important for me to pop downstairs and next door to see how the Lower Classes were spending their Xmas Day. Here, on the left of the photo, you can see Jeff (the Bristol Faery) and then International Lothario, Keith from Aylesbury.

The other lads on the right, with tattoes, are young entrepreneurs from the 'London' area who are over here in Thailand making themselves a deserved fortune through the clever exporting of quality imitation goods into Europe...you may well be wearing some item of theirs right now! Neil, with sun glasses on, has been my dive student for the past few days...an excellent and highly motivated young chap who is already a £millionaire at 27 through his own efforts...

In this pic we have Crusty Steve at the Head of the Table. His wife, Janey, is rarely to be seen as she understands her duties to her husband and was usually in the kitchen fixing her beloved another G and T. The other lads are Irish and, I kid you not, are wonderful musicians. Jimmy, wearing glasses, does the most poignant version of 'Waltzing Matilda' (you know, that brilliant version by The Pogues ages ago) and other traditional Irish songs accompanied by the other lads on Irish Whistle and Irish Drum...excellent!!!

It was a spendid day..starting at 1 pm and finishing about midnight and our genuine thanks go to our hosts for their generosity and for inviting us again this year.

A new and rather quaintly modest house has gone up just two 'doors' away from us. It has been built in a style to replicate one of the Royal Houses. I do not, as yet, know who owns this mansion but I am expecting him to enter the fray for our Xmas Day favours next year....

Jai said she wouldn't mind going.....

The new Pagoda

2011-12-25T21:05:00.000-08:00

It's a bit exposed by the house pool....so, this year's plan was to have a nice, shady pagoda built. Soon we will be able to have breakfast, snacks and evening drinks by the pool. Don't we ex-Pats live well??

Anyhow, here we have photo of the Thai workforce grafting away.

And here, we have 'The Jai' sweet talking the boss of the Building Company'....bet she's trying to extract a bit of commission for herself.

First phase is done...the support columns are up. The lads are tidying up by washing all the excess concrete onto my flower beds...yep, just the same here as back home...bloody, messy builders.

Now, Xmas Day, we are well into phase 2. The roof girders are going on....this is gonna be a STRONG pagoda...but it has to be as we have plenty wind here and stacks of rain in the Monsoon period.

Good to see the Thai's work over Xmas period. And our current guests?? Fast asleep after far too many G and T's last night....rascals, the lot of 'em!

Xmas Eve...Sunshine Bar, Rawai

2011-12-24T18:35:00.000-08:00

Welcome to the Christmas Eve Party at the Sunshine Bar in Rawai, our favourite fun bar.

And it's Jai opening the welcome with a well timed Thai Dance...

....before the Cabaraet Show begins.

Om and Jeff cuddle up to Brian, our heroic beach front land grabber/settler from New Zealand. With scant regard to local traditions, Brian just selected a piece of what will become prime beach frontage at Chalong....and started building on it 10 years ago. It was a courageous move and it has required a degree of shotgun standoff tactics.....but now the local Government has officially recognised Brian's landgrab...and he's going to get to keep it all!! Maybe it's something to do with the trips on his yacht he offers to the 'right' people????

And here are our charming hosts for the evening...(L to R) Om (Jeff's wife); Jai (strange person from Pitsanalok); Nong (Brian's wife) and standing, Peeyan (works for local Government...jolly useful lady to know!!)

Steve and Janey had got waylaid in the Tamarin Bar back up in Chalong....but our International Lothario, Keith turned up with this hot little number called Som...who announced she was gonna give him a Xmas Night he'd never forget. They haven't got up yet...so you'll have to wait until I've interviewed them to see if Som lived up to her promise and if Keith survived it....

We were treated to plenty of fireworks, music, laughter and erotic dancing throughout the evening....and then Father Christmas turned up...complete with dazzling blonde Swedish helper...

The Bar Mama, Khun Wallet Watcher, never misses a thing. She and her staff are SO on the ball.....there was no chnace of us scarpering in Santa's Tuk Tuk without paying the bill......

.....and now it's about 10 am on Xmas Day...the troops are slowly beginning to stir...we are off to neighbours for an extremely long Xmas lunch/dinner which I fear could end in yet another afternoon/night of drunken oblivion.

Yo Ho; Merry Xmas everyone

Kata Diving

2011-12-23T18:56:00.000-08:00

Our diving on Kata Reef yesterday allowed us to discover a few more Nudibranchs. For those hardened anglers reading this, I can feel your bafflement at such dinky little critters being of any interest....but, they are hard to find and quite rare. From a diver's point of view, it requires good underwater buoyancy control in order to be able to get a good look at these creatures...

....and to get nice, clear photographs the diver needs to be in complete control of his movements....so, well done to Jeff who is progressing very nicely and is now starting to take good photographs...as seen here. This is Jeff's last dive until next December...he and Om are off 'up country' after Xmas.

Coral bleaching is a problem, particularly in shallow waters. The reason given for 'bleaching' is the rise in water temperatures. Water temperatures in Phuket/Andaman Sea have been in excess of 30 degrees in the last few years...bleaching occurs (so I am told) at 33 degrees. (Reminder...this is SEA temp!!! It's pretty warm diving over here!). This coral has a hint of colour left on it...so you can imagine what the whole area would look like if the corals were still coloured.

Here's another little bit of coral. Kata is not the best place for coral but it's a great reef to practice dive skills and also to see a LOT of fish life...there's stacks of fish about. We were going to sea today on a longtail boat for a bit of offshore diving...but Jeff's gone and got injured. The Bristol Fairy had to be carried out of the Tamarin Bar last night....and, for a change, he was not drunk....the fool has gone and damaged his cartilage. Thought we were off to hospital last night!!

Nice little shot of a few fish hovering over a clump of rock near the surface.

Adventure Islands

2011-12-23T03:01:00.002-08:00

Today was 'sea trip to a couple of offshore islands' day. The various boats for fishing, diving and tripping all go from nearby Chalong Pier. Janey was delighted to get Steve away from the damn fish and claim him for the day.....see how merry she is??

First stop was the very beautiful Coral Island which is great for snorkling and enjoying lunch and a few drinks on the beach.

Coral Island is their favourite island and so they have purchased a charming beachside property, shown here, for a mere £7.53.

The Islands Day is a long one....here they are waiting for the sun to dip before heading back to Chalong and a seafood banquet on the sea shore....

...and there, ready to join us for two weeks, was our Hero, Keith! Welcome to our International Lothario....now let the fun and games commence.We are up to full strength now...house full...and adventures occuring!!

A Day at The Lake

2011-12-23T02:32:00.000-08:00

Mr Jeff Whittard, Bristol Fairy, has complained that whenever he goes bassing, there's never any fish and he returns home fishless. I tell him that there are thousands of bass 'out there' but that he is useless.

Mr Steve Thorne, master of sink waste systems, is at the other end of the spectrum. Whenever Steve fishes onboard Offshore Rebel he catches...'shed loads'.

So, it was to be an interesting day at the Phuket Game Park with the lake currently stocked with over 7,000 fish! Therefore, the first part of Jeff's demands had been met.....thousands of fish in a confined area...leaping out of the water to prove they existed. Even Jeff had to admit that there were indeed stacks of fish to be caught.

Mr Steve Thorne got stuck in immediately with a fine carp...

Fishing next to us was Adrian from Gloucester. Adrian and his friends were catching a mixture of piraya, catfish, including this fine red tailed catfish, and carp.

Captain Whittall of Weymouth was having fun with regular runs as big fish took off with the legered bread bait...here's one of the day's catfish.

Some cracking carp to 15kg were being caught from the various 'swims' around the lake.

Captain Whittall was adding to the variety with toothy paraya to 5kg...

Mr Thorne was all smiles as he bent into another lively rod bender.......

...and here he is with a very nice catfish...

It was a lively day with plenty of fish coming from all around the lake, plenty of runs and 'dropped fish', line bite offs and hooks bitten in half! These are fierce critters with very impressive teeth!!

And Mr Jeff Whittard??? Caught nothing. Yes, nothing! Out of the 7,000 rampaging fish.....he caught not one single fish.......!!!!!

Highlight of Jeff's day?? Catching a tree...which he did extremely well.

Kata Shore Dive

2011-12-19T02:43:00.000-08:00

The Kata reef starts about 200 yards off Kata Beach in Phuket. The whole reef is buoyed off to prevent entry by boats and to protect the reef and the snorklers and scuba divers it attracts. The reef runs from just 3 metres to 10 metres deep and is teeming with fish life and corals.

Because it is so shallow, it is possible to take some great pictures...as long as the currents haven't stirred up the fine sand. It's also an advantage if the reef hasn't been dived before you arrive as that also stirs up the sand.

Today was Jeff's first dive for some time and after a bit of getting sorted to start with he soon got into the dive and we managed to stay down 80 minutes....which is excellent. Jeff's always been very good on air use....

The Kata reef is particularly good for seeing small critters. This funny looking 'fish' is a pipefish and was about 9'' long. It's pretty hard to see them as they look like an old bit of seaweed...but, with patience, you can creep up on them and take a few photo's.

Many divers enjoy finding Nudibrancs. Nudibrance are shell-less molluscs and as such have developed a whole variety of defense mechanisms. Some species of Nudibranc are highly toxic and, if disturbed, can give off a powerful chemical. People who like to keep Nudibrancs in home aquariums have to be very careful not to cause them stress as they can easily wipe out a whole tank of tropical fish. Other Nudibrancs use camouflage or extremely bright colours as warning. There's over 2,000 different kinds of Nudibrancs in Asian waters...so it's no surprise to see one of these varieties for the first time. In fact, this is two Nudibrancs bonking...so it was a double first for me. Never seen this kind before and never seen Nudibrancs bonking...well, we are in Thailand after all!!

We also saw a massive shoal of barracuda which totally surrounded us, lots of angel and pufferfish, scorpion and lionfish, a few crabs and stacks of other fish..too many to mention. It's certainly a great place to dive.

Tomorrow, we go back to Kata and do it all again and then on Wednesday we shall charter a local longtail boat and go and dive one of the islands just offshore where no divers go. By then Jeff should be well trained up and ready for a dive with the local PADI Instructors who want me to show them the delights of Kata reef....well, won't Jeff be in the diving glitterati of Phuket on that occassion!

Just think...you could have a go at this when you come here for your winter break!!!!

Scuba Diving

2011-12-18T19:16:00.000-08:00

The main reason why I decided to spend winters in Thailand is simply because of our grotty winter weather in England. The sea is too rough, the winds are too strong; the temperature is crap...and you chaps do not have much fun out there....and nor do I....when such conditions are to be endured!

And, I love to go scuba diving. One of the things on offer here if you come to stay is free scuba diving. I know quite a few of you have tried in the past and for whatever reason, it hasn't worked for you. Some of you 'have always wanted to have a go' but time tends to slip by and the opportunty hasn't be there for you. And so, here you get the chance...and I am your illustrious teacher and guide...and we have a nice little house pool to learn the first skills in.

There's no time pressure so you can take all the time you like in the pool to learn and practice the skills required at your own pace. We have the PADI books and Videos in the house for you to read and watch...you can go into it as deeply as you like. ..and I take you gently through the PADI Open Water course. If you get hooked, which I hope you do, you could go on to do the full PADI course at one of the nearby Dive Centres and gain your Open Water Certification which means you can then scuba dive anywhere in the world with PADI (Professional Association of Dive Instructors).

Several years ago, Jeff (Bristol Fairy) had a go and enjoyed it so much he progressed to take his PADI OW (Open Water) Certificate. Today we are just preparing to go to our favourite shore dive site. We've spent a bit of time in the pool refreshing our skills, checked all the gear; had the tanks checked and filled with air...and laid out the stuff to make sure we have everything we need.

There's quite a bit of kit needed and this is NOTHING compared to what is required in UK. You will see a couple of scuba tanks, BCD's (Buoyancy Control Devices...in other words, the jackets we wear), fins, masks, suits, regulators, cameras, compasses....it has to be carefully checked and prepared. Unlike angling, you cannot afford to make mistakes....you MUST get it right...so the training and having the correct, properly maintained kit is essential.

All this stuff is available when you come to stay...buggar, I've spent a fortune on it....so it's a real bonus if you'd like to have a go.

Yo Ho, we are just waiting for the girls to come back with the cars and then we are off!!!

Dinner and Negotiations at Bonsai Restaurant

2011-12-18T17:14:00.000-08:00

Last night we visited the Bonsai Restaurant in Chalong which is one of the most interesting places to eat as it is packed with antiques (including us last night).

We arrived in the Rolls Royce the restaurant send to collect guests (yep, guests as opposed to customers....you're treated in a proper manner).

Jeff, having clinched a major building deal in Bristol, had bought his Thai wife, Om, a sports car which the previous owners had arranged to have waiting inside the Bonsai restaurant...which was a nice touch to the evening.

Jai is now waiting to negotiate a deal on some of the restaurant's antiques. Janey and Steve are antiques dealers/collectors and are always out for a bargain to take home....so The Jai was sent in to open the price bartering.

Meanwhile....not being interested in such high financial dealings, I wandered around the restaurant grounds..,admiring all the little Bonsai trees. It's a great concept for a restaurant....loads of valuable items set amongst an ornamental and subtly lit garden with guests seated in secluded corners enjoying an extremely original menu featuring alligator, croc, ostrich, snake, various fish ...

Janey..usually the business head of Thorne Enterprises...was intrigued to listen in to Jai's opening negotiations on the few items they were interested in. The staff thought Janey's stalking antics were most amusing. In fact, Janey looks positively meercatish in this shot....and it was noted that stir fried meercat was one of the more ununsual items on the menu.

It has often been said, when someone is sitting between Janey and Steve, that they are a 'rose between two Thornes' (Get it?? Jane and Steve Thorne??). Here they are with 'An old Urn between Two Thornes'. As can be seen, at this stage, negotiations had almost reached a conclusion and a serious offer was about to be offered.

Success!! The Thorne Antiques Company have clinched a whole load of old crockery and here it is on display before being packed ready for shipping back to the UK. The whole lot was purchased for one million Baht (about £20k). Steve and Janey are delighted with an absolute bargain; the restaurant owners are happy as this lot cost 12 Bhat (26 pence) to produce in their ovens round the back....and so everybody was happy.

And so, back to the carpark...Om and Jai are laughing their heads off (as usual) after having received a hefty commission from the restaurant owners...and are looking forward to speeding downtown in Om's new red sports car to dance the night away at The Tiger Bar.

We English are off to the Sports Bar to watch the Arsenal V Man City match..

Ah, another quiet evening in Chalong......

Fishing Competition...Saturday 17th Dec

2011-12-17T16:52:00.000-08:00

I joined the Rawai Game Fishing club earlier in the week and took part in their sponsored Freshwater event yesterday. I am useless at freshwater fishing but thought it would be a good chance to meet some of the club members, many of whom live in Phuket and have various businesses including restaurants, bars, clubs and ....boats!

There were 40 competitors, many of whom were Swedish. There is a big Scandinavian presence in Phuket and the Swedes in particular love to go fishing. I was put into a two man team with a Swedish chap called Ulra and yep, he did look like a Viking...and he had Viking Hero's tattoed all over him! Ulra owns the Paradise Bar in Kata. (Haven't been to that bar...yet! Will rctify situation next week and give full report with photo's). Unfortunately, Ulra was even worse at fishing than me...and didn't even get a bite. In fact it was a pretty quiet day...I 'dropped' my first fish, landed the second (an 8kg carp) and then managed a 5kg pirhana right at the end. Only 3 teams weighed in two or more fish...so, at least we kept up.

Hero of the day was another Swedish angler, Mr Mikael Amundsson. Mikael also caught three fish (and his team partner blanked) but they were cracking fish. His first was a 16kg catfish, then a 14lkg carp and then a 5kg pirhana. His total was 73lb (dunno why the total catch weight reverted to lbs..but at least I understood that).

Mikael won 5,000 Baht (£100 for biggest fish) and 20,000 Baht (£400) for heaviest bag.

Today, we should be at sea. Jeff Whittard (The Bristol Fairy) and Steve Thorne (Andover) were on this trip. We were joining up with three other anglers...and two of them just happened to be Mikael and his son Felix who were fishing in the next swim to me in yesterday's comp. Mikael owns The Salaloy Seafoof Restaurant on Rawai Beach...so, a very useful contact and we will no doubt be visiting him in the next few days.

Well, it's a real shame we are not at sea...because of the windy conditions (yep, plenty of wind here too, chaps) so today we go to plan B which is getting Jeff scuba diving again...and into the sea tomorrow.

The First Week of Suffering

2011-12-16T00:27:00.000-08:00

Yeah..I know...you were all expecting daily bulletins. Well, I've been busy sorting stuff. You know how it is.

This week I joined the Rawai Game Fishing Club. This is the view from their HQ Clubhouse and Bar on Rawai Beach. It was a bit hard for me to stay there too long with such a tedious outlook and foul weather along with the incessant desire of the two charming bar ladies to bring me drinks and mop my fevered brow. Ah, well...I look upon all these trials as necessary to try and make life easier for you gentlemen when you come. You know, trying out local attractions etc..

And the advantage of joining the Club? Well, now I attend various fishy type functions and can bring everyone along as my club guests. And we get trips a bit cheaper on the boats. Tomorrow, I am taking part in a Club fishing competition on one of the lakes so will hopefully meet a few of the members. I understand a few of the lads have got their own boats...?????

By the end of today there will be 3 anglers here to stay for a couple of weeks...they are allowed to recover from Jet Lag etc tomorrow while I am away fishing and then on Sunday we set off for the first of our 3 day Similan Island liveaboard fishing trips. The last trip we did (in March 2011) was the final Blog entry before returning to Weymouth earlier in the year...take a look at the fish for an idea of what it's all about.

There's lots of little secrets to discover on Phuket. On my way back from Thai lessons one day, I stopped at a little roadside bar for a coffee and to try and descramble my brain after my two hour intensive language lesson and chatted to the owner. She asked me if I liked swimming. Thinking this was another of those 'come upstairs' Thai lady chat-up lines, I reluctantly forced myself to follow her across the road, into a small shopping mall and up some stairs. Thinking fortune was actually smiling on me for once, she took my hand and led me onto the top floor and showed me the view. A roof top swimming pool!! Immaculate. Big. Deep. Pristine water. No people. Bloody Hell!! (Person in pool is The Jai...I allow her to come sometimes).

And now, every other day I try to pound up and down the pool for an hour. I am assured by this week's chaps that they too want to try and do a few lengths (yeah, I bloody bet they do!!) before the day gets too hot.

Unbelievable, eh? I mean..just look at it. The only downside is the cost. It's a whole £1 but luckily you can stay all day if you wish until 9pm. Well, it is important to get value for money when such large sums are being handed over.

Lunch...yes...served on the Colonial Veranda...at £3. Drinks, ice creams, massage, Sir....yeah, if you must.

Funny how certain words and phrases come to mind as used by friends back home. I find I am often quoting Mr Chris Caines (he of Tiger Lily fame...and NOT happy at the moment.....b***ted boats). 'I'm pissed off being so happy'....ha; some of us are born to suffer. No doubt Jeff, Steve and Keith will be feeling just as depressed this time tomorrow.

The previous Blog featured ex-UK charter skipper John Pearce's new £1 million Game Fishing boat. I visited John a couple of days ago. He's moved to Phuket Boat Lagoon. It must be awful living at this Marina. The entrance to the Marina from the busy Phuket Town/Airport road has uniformed security staff who doff their caps or salute you as you drive in. The grounds are immaculate, lawns, scrubs, flowers...all being manicured by a team of uniformed Thai gardeners. There's a shopping centre, bars, marina side restaurants, sleek little harbourside boutiques, cafes...in fact, a whole little world contained within the marina boundary.

And the houses?? Serious dosh some of them...£$zillions. John's lovely 3 bed-roomed bungalow opens out onto the scene above. You can fish from your lounge or bedroom. These little canals lead into the main marina...so there's fish all over the place.

After a hard day's Game Fishing, you can leave your boat on the pontoon for the harbour staff to crawl all over with the fresh water and then polish, get into your tender and gently cruise back to your marina side dwelling...with the patio doors opening as you approach and the slender form of the house maid waiting with a G and T in her elegant hand as you disembark.

You know, this is a bloody terrible place to live. I don't know how I am going to put up with it until the end of March. I mean, as I sat there looking at this view, sipping my G and T, house maid (they're all expert massagers) releasing the tension from my neck and shoulders (yeah, yeah..I know what you're thinking), I found myself thinking of my fellow skippers enjoying gale force conditions and rapidly declining temperatures back home in Weymouth and wondering how my beloved customers were passing their day....

Yes, chaps, I miss you all dearly.

MFV Mari Timo

2011-12-11T06:01:00.000-08:00

John Pearce left the delights of skippering his Bradwell based charter angling boat Argonaunt 23 years ago and since suffered the hell of living in the tropical paradise known as Phuket, Thailand.

After working for the Chalong based Wahoo Game Fishing for many years, John's latest venture is to be running this fabulous new Maritimo 54'. The 31 tonne Maritimo is made in Australia, boasts a 17 metre beam and is powered by twin 12 Litre 715 HP Cats.

Maritimo fully understand the importance of the engine room layout on a working charter boat...just like our boat builders 'back home' (ha, bloody ha). Everything is beautifully laid out....easy to work on...

...the filters are all lined up on the bulkhead...dead easy to change. I prefer, as do many of my UK fellow skippers, to do the daily contortionist act and have to lie over my engines, enjoying the sweet sensation of burning myself whilst trying to get a grip on the filters which are embedded in the most inaccessible parts of our engines.

It seems that many boatbuilders and engine designers around the world do not possess the same sense of humour as we in the UK experience. I mean, it's just great trying to work on our engines...the chances of straining your back, cutting your hands, battering yer knuckles etc etc...wouldn't want to miss out on it.

I mean..look at it, fellow charter skippers....we could all have this level of thoughtful workmanship. The boat only costs a £1 million quid...we'd soon recover that outlay with our charter fees???? This bit of shiny stainless is the Fresh Water Maker system. Ha, give me a plastic bottle filled from Weymouth Harbourside any day!

It may be noticed that this fine craft is registered in Guernsey...as are many vessels in Phuket. Why?? Well, more of that later this week. Suffice to say, I have been invited on her inaugral fishing trip this coming week....more photo's and details will follow!!!!

....and for the Ladies

2011-12-11T05:50:00.000-08:00

The Mari Timo...Charter boat Luxury for the Gals

Here she is...pristine and sparkling...ready to go to the next pontoon for G and T's and a bit of posing.

Flying Deck controls in comfort. Note how The Jai does not wear yellow oilskins, sea boots, woolly bobble hat when sitting on this white leather upholstery, fondling gleaming controls.

TV Saloon.....galley off to starboard...the vessel has 3 crew plus a full time lady chef!!!

Three quality en-suite bathrooms. See how happy The Jai looks...she ain't ever gonna want the facilities aboard Offshore Rebel again!

Top notch cabins, double beds, all with TV's and Hi Fi's'; shiny woodwork, carpets....is this REALLY a charter angling boat. How long would it last back home???

Are we envious??? In a word....YES!!!!

3 Day Similan Islands Trip

2011-03-20T21:45:00.000-07:00

Any boat trip on a Thai boat starts off with Chinese Crackers being suspended from a bamboo pole and lit....the noise is to call on all good spirits to protect us at sea. I'd like to do this when we go under the Town Bridge in Weymouth at the start of every Alderney trip...I get the feeling we'd be arrested pretty quick!!!

Cost of a trip to English people is the most important factor....and no matter what I put on here, no matter what the cost, there will be readers saying 'How much??? That's too much!!!' Ah, well....whatever.

Khun Moo owns a tackle shop in Chalong. I arranged the trip through him. The trip cost 50,000 Baht for the three days. 50,000 Baht is about £1,100. On top of that we paid (there were four of us) 2,500 Baht each (£55) for all the tackle to be provided. Moo bought STACKS of gear. We each had trolling gear (Penn Internationals to 50lb class Shimano rods and a vast assortment of trolling lures); an electric reel set-up (electric reel loaded with 1,500 metres of braid, 50 to 80lb class rods),; light spinning gear for live bait fishing; and popper rigs with 15kg rods and Shimano bait-runner reels. This stuff must have cost a fortune!!! You can bring your own tackle....but you need a lot because of the variety of fishing we did.

There were four Thai crew. Two worked the tackle...keeping on top of it, setting it up up etc etc along with Khun Moo. The service was excellent. When we were fishing, all four crew were on standby to assist.

Food onboard was brilliant. There was stacks of fish to eat....but also chicken, pork and plenty of fruit and veg. Very, very good meals.

Popper Lures....Khun Moo brought along two big boxes of lures...all sorts for the trolling and popper fishing.

We stopped for livebait and used the usual 'sandeel feather' rig.....plenty of mackerel and a great big live bait tank to keep them in.

On the way out to the Similan Islands we were trolling. We caught king mackerel and dorado, stacks of small tuna (for bait and Sushi) and mackeral. Here's Richie with his first ever dorado that put up a brilliant fight, leaping out of the sea many times.....very exciting.

We saw plenty of dolphin. We did see marlin jumping but we had agreed to concentrate on drift fishing, fishing at anchor, popper fishing and light lining....none of us enjoy trolling that much so this had all been agreed beforehand.

Fishing in 200 to 22 metres of depth would have been hard work using ordinary reels...especially when we were catching black grouper like these. (See previous Blog on electric reels).

At night we were anchored. You could fish all night if you could stay awake.....we fished as much as we could! Here's a terrific red snapper caught by Keith.

And here's a black grouper....we were using two hook paternoster rigs with 200lb snoods as the grouper grow to 50kg!

Some of you will have fished out of Phuket or experienced the local longtail boat fishing out of Rawai.....so compare that sort of catch with this. This is our first day's catch!!!!

It was brilliant having Khun Moo....so much tackle spread round the boat to cater for each style of fishing. Here were rigs all prepared and ready to go in case of snap-offs or required rig change.

E.F.S.A. World Chairman, Horst Sneider (many of you will meet him in the EFSA Festival to be held in Weymouth in September) was our fourth team member. Horst, as near to that great man Ernest Hemmingway as you will ever meet, has fished everywhere in the world. Listening to his tales, exploits and catches made us realise just how much of an exciting world there is out there to fish in. A good way to experience some of this is to join EFSA!!!!

Trolling is all about letting the gear do the work as the boat travels along at 6 knots. Some people love trolling and most boats out of Chalong concentrate on this style.....we just did it going out to the Similans and back...

We also fished 200m metres on the drift over coral peaks and big granite boulder sea beds.....important to maintain attention at all times due to the fluctuating depths....but the rewards were high with some cracking snapper to 10kg and grouper to 20kg.

Red snapper like these are lively fighters and make amazing eating. Here is Khun Jeng, one of our crew, with a nice red snapper caught by Richard.

If you fish electric, then you have to have a power supply....and here it is....a hefty and weighty battery. Then you need chargers to keep them topped up at night. We had electric cables and chargers all over the place....it's a LOT of gear!

Light spinning rods at the ready at the bow of the boat.

This is the Thai equivalent of the red gurnard...strange looking fish, especially the mouth area. This is EFSA Chairman, Mr Horst Sneider.

You might be able to make out the depth on the sounder...over 200 metres.

Khun Saam...another of the crew with a very nice ruby snapper.

We were like a floating tackle shop...Khun Moo had certainly worked very hard on our behalf.....

Horst is at the stern along with crewman Khun Chaa. The Thai crew were excellent....very helpful. They couldn't speak much English but who cares...it's the brotherhood of fishing and we all speak the same language of friendship.

We ate lots of fish!! (Don't worry...there's lots of other stuff to eat if you don't like fish)

The crew were all dab hands at cooking and all helped each other to do the various jobs.

The EFSA flag flies the world over.............

Now, I could write a massive feature on this trip as we did so much...but I hope the photo's give a flavour of what we got up to. You may have enjoyed the Blogs on the Freshwater fishing as well. I want to push the fishing as much as possible....but it's all up to who comes here to stay and what you can afford.

Last night I had dinner with John Pearce (you can look him up on Facebook...just type in his name and Phuket). John runs a top of the range Game Boat and concentrates on Andaman Island trips....5 dyas seems favourite. He confirmed the price yeaterday....£2,000 per day! So, £10,000 for 5 days...and you have to fly there from India. Four on the boat is as much as you want....so compare that at £2,500 each (without tips) as compared to us at £370 each.

John's boat is the height of air-conditioned luxury. Our boat was a 15 metre wooden chugger Thai boat. Facilities were very basic........so, you really get what you pay for.

This will probably be the final Blog from Thailand this year. I go back to Weymouth in 2 days time....so this 'winter season's adventures' draw to a close. It's been brilliant...each time her e gets better. But it's all up to you guys who come to stay to make it a good experience. I have to say that this season we have enjoyed the company of some smashing people....so, thanks to everyone for coming and now I look forward to returning to Weymouth and seeing my sons again....and getting back out into the English Channel with all my delightful, merry customers.

See you soon!!

Electric reels in The Similans

2011-03-20T03:41:00.000-07:00

The seven Similan Islands lay some 50 miles out in the Andaman Sea to the west of Koa Lak which is 50 miles north of Phuket. The name may ring a bell with some of you as this area was very badly hit in the 2004 Tsunami.

Much of our fishing over the three days took place another 5 miles or so further west in depths ranging from 150 to 220 metres and we needed a fair bit of lead to get the two hook paternoster rigs down to those depths.

Our fishing guide, Mr Moo, the Phuket equivalent of Alderney's Mark Harding, is an angling fanatic and full of enthusiasm. He provided all the tackle for the four of us and himself on the trip. This cost £50 each for hire of the tackle. You could bring your own but it would be virtually impossible to carry all the stuff required on the plane and the gear was top quality and very expensive. We used four different set of gear over the three day period.

These electric reels cost between £600 and £1,200 each depending on make etc and were loaded with 1,500 metres of 80lb braid.....very expensive if there was a snap off due to the very snaggy bottom being caught.

Controls were simple to use...basically a 'let down', a 'retrieve' and a fast rerieve (used on the strike) buttons. There were a whole range of further tuning controls but those 3 bttons were enough. The drag system was a simple star drag.

The reels also had depth metres on them which was very useful especially on the retireve. We had four Thai crew on the boat and they stayed with us until they were sure we had mastered the reels. The main problem is anglers not watching the retrieve and keeping the reel in power wind...and jamming the first swivel into the rod tip. Result of this is either first ring destruction, rop tip snapping or the reel getting jammed in gear and in danger of a burn out. It's very hard to get the reels repaired in Thailand.

I guess it's up to each of you if you are in favour of an electric reel or not. I have never used one before....and I wasn't too keen to start with. However, the alternative would be to use a twin speed reel like a Shimano Beast Master. And 220 metres is a very long way to bring your gear up for a bait check with the 2lb (or 3lb) lead required. And try going it with a double figure fish or two fighting back.

Coral reefs are very snaggy....so the weights used are like this....bar cut to weight. Set on a rotton bottom...simple but effective

It's better to fish a few turns off the bottom and keep a tight control on the line because when the boat swings (we were at anchor for much of the time...yes, in 220 metres) then the depth varies considerably. Thus the rods were placed under constant pressure.

Here's Richie bending into a hefty fish.....but no problem as the reels are very powerful bits of kit. You just get the drag set right and...hang on!!!!!

The reels were all different makes.....if you click on the photo then it will enlarge within the Blog and you tackle enthusiasts can see for yourselves the make of model of each reel.

Here's Keith bending into a fish.

The great thing about this trip is you could fish as much as you wanted...all night if you could keep awake. It's tiring and the old Thai fishing boats do rock and roll. You may also see how low the gunnels are set and that there are no safety railings....so you have to keep alert and maintain your balance. It's no good coming on such a trip and then spending the whole time whining about safety etc....the Thai's will just laught at you.

After this trip, I am converted to the using of electric reels when fishing in such depths. It would be too exhausting, especially in the 30 degrees+ heat, to keep fishing for hours with a non-electric reel.

So, a very good new experience................an done that I hope some of you will be able to experience when you come here for your winter holiday.

Off out now....with John Pearce...charter skipper who left UK 25 years ago and worked for Wahoo Gamne Fishign for a long time but currently runnign a superb Game Boat owned by a wealthy gentleman from Singapore. John's come back from a month chartering in the Andaman Islands catching marlin, giant tuna and sailfish.

Prices for his charters are astronomical (£2k per day)...there's no where I will ever be able to go on such a boat trip...but tonight will be a great evening listening to his adventures.Tomorrow I will do the Blog section on the actual trip we did and the terrific fish we caught....we MUST do more of this fishing...but it's all up to you chpas when/if you come if we can get such another triop together.

Thai Gals

2011-03-20T02:20:00.000-07:00

Yo Ho...and before I start banging on about electric reels, fish and more fish....let's just have a look at several of the young ladies our current dynamic duo have befriended....for no other reason than that they are charming, always smiling, polite, friendly, good natured....and extremely good at indoor sports.

Sawadi Krab, Khun Jeb......watching you wandering around my house has been a heart warming experience....

And Nong....ah, what that smile has done for young Richard.................

And let's not forget Daa......she of the terrific sense of humour and her 'kindness to Papa' gestures....

...and 'the boss' of one of the many Chalong Bars....Khun Jin...always welcomes us with a free drink and a neck massage whilst you are cooling down from a hot day at sea....

And why not finish with another snap of Keith's young lady, Jeb....

Somehow, I think our 'Welcome Back from Sea' in the Sailors Return' will not be quite the same....

I shall leave these up for a few hours whilst I gird myself for a look at our 3 day Similan Island trip....which resulted in 500kg of fish......!!!!!!!!!

Monk's House Blessing

2011-03-14T18:31:00.000-07:00

Jai and I were invited to our Thai neighbour's House Blessing Ceremony.

This is an important part of Thai Culture....but there is also the complications of Social Status to take into account. Status is reflected by the number of monks who are invited to come to give the Blessing. 9 is the maximum.....and only for those at the top end of the social hierarchy. A family who are not wealthy or do not have the required status may only be able to afford one monk. But, on the other hand, the main thing in terms of Buddhism, is not the number of monks who attend but the quality and sincerity of the prayers offered by all those in attendance! Well, YOU figure it out. Thai Culture is massively complex....and I am just skating along the surface....and probably always will.

Our neightbour, Khun Tony, is the owner of J.B. Pools and exports pools all over the world, especially to China. He was telling me that this year he had a big export contract to Libya ...so that's all out of the window with the troubles over there.

Thai upper class people are famous for their politeness. It is EXTREMELY important for everyone to be VERY polite. Correct greetings, correct social etiquette observed, correct behaviour at all times.

Also, the Thai upper class ladies are very easy to tell. Not only are they incredibly polite and courteous, they pride themselves on being 'white skinned'. If you are tanned...it means you work out in the sun. Only the 'lower class' have to work out in the sun...builders, farmers...and fishermen. I am, of course, at the very lowest end of the social scale...I am tanned, I work in the sun, I am a fisherman. We are known in England as 'Scum'.....and that's about my level over here!! Ha Ha...it gets very confusing for the Thai's because status is also accorded to Education and apparant wealth. We Europeans can afford to travel.....thus by Thai definition we are rich...and so we are high up the social scale. But then we like to go out in the sun and go brown! Oh dear, very confusing!! I have many entertaining converstations with my confused Thai neighbours.

You can see in this photo above how elegant...and white....upper class Thai ladies are!

Tony lives 2 houses away. Since I have been here, he has been a terrific neighbour. We have been to each other's parties. Remember, I confused everyone here as I was the first person on the project to hold the Monks House Blessing Ceremony (with 7 monks; Tony had 9...ooops!), and then the Spirit House Ceremony and finally a full on House Warming party 3 years ago.
in which we all got drunk on Thai Whiskey and threw each other in the pool.

I really like the hypnotic chanting that the monks perform for at least an hour at these ceremonies. They chant in Sanskrit...the old Indian language ( a bit like our Church services were held in Latin not so long ago) so the Thais understand the actual meaning of the language as much (or as little) as me!

The monks are extremely nice people. They come from all levels of socail life...but once they become monks, everyone is equal (is there such a thing?). Most Thai men enter the monkhood for at least once in their lifetime. They can stay for at least a month...but can remain as long as they like. Last year, I met a fisherman who had entered the monkhood for a month 'to please his father'. But this year, he is still there. He says it has given him a different outlook on his life...and he can stay as long as he likes....Many of the monks can speak good English. They study English and skills in the Temple and will often go to outlying villages to teach children whose parents cannot afford to send them to school.

Food is really important in Thailand. Again, the correct rituals must be observed at such a gathering. And it is important to have STACKS of food. you might recall the HSB adverts on TV when the Bank representative is in China.....and is in a Chinese restaurant. He finishes his meal...so more (and larger portions) are brought; he finishes that as well...the Chinese are disconcerted...in the end they bring him a bloody gurt conger eel and slap that on the table in an attempt to satisfy him!! It's polite in Europe to finish your meal....in Asia, it means your host has not provided enough!!!!! Oh no, the disgrace!!

So, if there isn't enough food to offer the guests...then this is terrible for the host! Everyone should end up more than full with plenty of food left....this shows the household can provide for everyone with plenty to spare. This spare food is then distributed to the 'poor people' via the monks. (Luckily, I get a doggy bag...am I regarded as poor or just an eccentric Foreigner who loves Thai food?)

Thai food is richly varied in colour and texture...........and believe me, real Thai food is spicy. I don't just mean a whimpy tingle on your tongue like in the restaurants catering for us mamby pambies......I mean 'eyeballs leaving their sockets and going into orbit' level! Wow!!!.......on fire for the rest of the day!!

And here are our charming hosts with Khun Tony on the right with his wife, Khun Jaa and then his son and wife.

The morning ceremony started at 0800 and The Jai and I left at 1300 in the afternoon!!!......but the 'party' continued until evening. The Thais certainly know how to throw a good House Blessing.

Fishing!!!!!!

2011-03-11T04:23:00.000-08:00

Today was going to be the Jean/Graham Versus the June/Graham Grand Fishing Competition. We've already had several golfing tournaments...so the team were very excited about this new challenge.

The favourites were our June/Graham team as Graham had proved himself to be a nifty striker a couple of weeks ago at the same venue.

But, as dawn broke and we were awakened by the monks next door chanting yet more blessings (well, we need 'em), the sad news came from above that June had been disabled by the dreaded 'trots' and would be unable to concentrate on her fishing...which as we all know requires a good deal of bending under strain....not a good idea in the circumstances.

But undeterred by this natural disaster, Jean and Graham decided to carry on with the day's plan...and for both of them this was their first ever attempt at lake fishing.

We got off to a flying start with a couple of catfish and a nice Siamese carp in the first hour.....but then we descended into a lengthy lull broken only by losing fish into the weeds or getting 'bitten off'. There was also an impressive amount of casting high into the trees...quite amazing how much foliage became snarled up on our duo's hooks. Leaves, branches, weeds, rushes...this pair are definitely the most inventive when it comes to casting techniques. I was extremely grateful for the bamboo shelters provided around the lake as places that I could duck into and hide when casting took place.

In the next swim were young Max and father Henry from Warwickshire. They had a magnicent day and could not stop catching....they reckoned they landed 30 fish at least....everytime we looked they were into fish. And this is the first time I have seen a red tailed catfish and a domehead catfish come from this lake. They also caught pirhana and carp. Here's young Max with a redtailed catfish.

But then, as often happens with fishing, we started to get a few bites and five more very nice carp and catfish came to the net.

Our novices did us proud.....3 carp with the best one at 30lb, five catfish to about 15lb, 17 branches, 182 bank reeds and an array of flora and fauna were all hooked and returned safely!

Another great day at Phuket Fishing Park.......

A trip with Captain Ta Won

2011-03-09T04:04:00.000-08:00

We have been lucky to have Captain Ta Won as our regular boat skipper. We have enjoyed many trips out on his longtail boat either on Island visits, evening fishing or diving trips. He has been a great find. Very experienced, dead reliable and a great bloke.

Our team visited two nearby islands for sun, swimming, sight-seeing, and eating....

There are plenty of nearby islands....they are all slightly different...but they all have sparkling beaches, crystal clear sea for fabulous snorkling....and good food!!

This particular island is famous for its gurt lizards...I dunno what they are called. Monitor lizards?? Maybe someone can tell me. They come out to play and take chicken from you. Apparantly they have been known to swim out to sea and take people off their lilo's. Our guests did not suffer any such tragedy as June had Anti Lizard repellant in her handbag....she's got EVERYTHING in that bag of hers.

Ah.....it's a hard life...all this chilling out in the sunshine

...lazing about in the sea or donning a mask to see the zillions of colourful fish...

...and sampling out all the many many many Thai dishes in the beach restaurants.

This is just such a great place............I see the weather is 4 degrees right now back home 35 degrees here) .......you HAVE to come out here for a holiday....you must be utterly bonkers not to!!!!!

Golfing in Phuket

2011-03-09T03:36:00.001-08:00

Golfing is a major part of many ex-Pats life here in Phuket and there are a number of golf courses to choose from.

Our quartet of Jean, June, Graham and Gram went off for their third game today.

As ever, I am intrigued by the number of times everyone has to go up and down the stairs to get stuff.....17 times today between them....which is only 4 times each (approx). I am told that this number may be far greater in Weymouth as there are so many weather variations to consider before finally leaving home for a round on the Golf Course. Therefore endless combinations of clothes and footwear, various items of make-up, hats, brollies/sunshades etc etc etc as well as the complexities of which irons/clubs to take have to be considered.

And the pre-match banter is clearly extremely important to psyche the players up. Today it was Lads v Lasses day....and the gals announced they were going to 'give the chaps a thrashing'. Quite a brutal game, this golf.

In Thailand, the players are provided with Caddies.....all charming and enthusiastic Thai ladies. At the last game, Graham (up to you to decide which Graham) was given his Caddy's phone number. On this occasion, Jean's charming little minx explained that she didn't have a boyfriend and wanted an English one....and could she come back to England in Jean's case.

I dunno, these Thai gals..............

Anyhow, here's a couple of shots provided by our roving photographer, June. Today's course has plenty of water all over it....so it's a course where balls regularly disappear!!

I hope more of you who enjoy golf come on over to stay. It is advisable to bring your own clubs as hiring is about £25 per day. Many of the Aircraft Companies offer a special deal on transporting Sports Equipment....it would certainly be a way to keep the prices down as golf ain't cheap.

And who gave who 'the thrashing'??? The lads, of course.....spanked the gals. (I quite like this golfing vocabulary...has a certain suggestive 'Je ne sais quois' about it......

The Big Buddha

2011-03-09T03:18:00.000-08:00

The Big Buddha site is developing rapidly. The scaffolding is off the main image now and the marble tiles have been added so it is sparkling in the sun...looks very impressive. The building relies on donations and now there are many things for sale...all to do with Buddhism...lots of interesting things to put in your house!

Here's our Culture Vultures along with their well dressed tour guide.......

When the Temple is finished it will be amazing. There is a pictorial representation on the site as to how the whole project will look on completion...it is going to be a major tourist attraction...it really will be amazing.

I don't know how long it's going to take to competely finish...it is a massive project. Maybe another five years...but in Thailand, time has very little meaning.

Elephant Trekking

2011-03-09T03:07:00.000-08:00

It's essential to have a ride on an elephant when you are here!!! Here we are at the Big Buddha elephant trekking centre. Everytime we drive up to the Big Buddha things change.....there's new restaurants, monkey show, viewpoints. Now there's a nice little place on stilts to have a drink before leaping onto your elephant for an hour's lumber through the jungle with views across Chalong Bay and up to the Big Buddha.

Not sure if Graham thinks he's in the Titanic movie or simply doesn't want Jean to get any attention so is doing his best to block her out.....it's no wonder she gets emotional!!

Here's our courageous quartet....meeting up in some previously undiscovered jungle clearing. Note the umbrella thoughtfully provided by June out of her handbag.

How do gals manage to stuff so much into their bags????

An Emotional Day for Jean.

2011-03-08T02:11:00.000-08:00

It's been an emotional day for Jean.

We found The Jai hanging about at the top of the Big Buddha Mountain, admiring the view down to Little Kata Bay. Jean, used to the greys and more greys of Portland set against a backdrop of usually grey sky was so overcome by the colour and beauty of the scene that she had to leave....dabbing her eyes with her tissue.

This is the problem with Phuket's scenery....it cannot fail to bring a tear to the eyes.

And worse....the whole Big Buddha Temple, the colourful regalia, my imaginative explanations, June's bag fiddling technique...as you can see, it was all too much for Jean.....

And then we had to leave the Big Buddha Temple as it was time for we chaps to sink a few Singha's.....Jean didn't want to leave...but all good things must end.

Down to the nearest restaurant with a dramatic sea view.Fighting back the tears, Jean launched bravely into the restaurant's speciality, Minced Elephant Droppings (we were very near to the Elephant Trekking Centre). Laced with honey, they apparantly make a tasty dish.

And look at the effect on our Weymouth/Portland gal!! Suddenly the smiles were back...amazing the effect of a plateful of balls can have.

And talking of round things...take a look at what has been sent from the Chard establishment. As you know, Gary and Bert are obsessed with Ladyboys....this is the stuff of Fantasies for them....so, thanks Gary, for sharing this ...I know everyone is gonna love it!!!! (Altho' maybe not as much as you and Bertie).

Highlight this picture.....it will expand...then you can see the writing and the important bits. Happy Days......

World Record????

2011-03-05T02:49:00.000-08:00

Today Rit bought his charming girlfriend Supattana to learn to dive. Rit is the Managing Director of World Offset Printing and is the person responsible for making my project on Wat Chalong into such an attractive booklet. Rit is already a PADI diver but Supattana, known by her nickname as Mook, had never tried before.

Because of being delayed in a meeting, the pair turned up much later than we expected and that meant we had to do a pool test dive very quickly so we could get to the dive shop and refill my tank!

So, our time in the pool was a whole 5 minutes....Mook told me she was a quick learner...and she certainly was pretty amazing!! She was down on the pool bottom within seconds and looked completely at ease in the dive gear.

So, we raced off to Dive Supply....but they were closing as we came to the the shop. That meant I had a whole 90 Bar in the tank....this was going to be a shallow breathing exercise for me!

Anyhow, you can see that with Rit's assisatnce, Mook managed a successful first dive and we managed to last 40 minutes.....well done to Mook!

And here are our Underwater Lovefish....with the Romantic Rit planting a Congratulatory kiss on Mook.

The world record for the fastest ever training session before going to the sea??? I think so! I put it all down to the BCD Mook was wearing. The jacket belongs to the inspirational Ai Futaki who has just entered the Guiness Book of Records for her record breath hold dive in a cave. Take a look on http://www.deeperblue.com/newsfull.php/2396. Ai left her battered BCD with me several years ago and it's been put to very good use ever since with the various ladies who have learnt to dive in it.

So, Ai.....not only are you an absolute inspiration to many....even your old dive gear is!!!

Well Done to Mook! Ai would be proud of you! Thanks to Rit for being such a good Buddy on Mook's first dive...and let's hope this is the start of your Scuba Diving adventures together.

And here's Ai...Japanese Ladies Freediving record holder; Guiness Book of Record Holder...freediving with a whaleshark. Well, that's the sort of Adventuress she is!!

Graham and Jean arrive...

2011-03-03T17:03:00.000-08:00

And now we have two new guests, golfing buddies of Graham and June. They are Graham and Jean. Jean is the sister of Paul Wilson...you know of 'Sauders and Wilson' Fish Merchants. It's now just Paul and I understand Paul's Property Empire has grown to include owning most of Fortuneswell in Portland. So all of us who have landed fish to him in the past will be glad to know our labours at sea, battling the Race to get a few bass, have not been in vain.

Here's Jean and Graham having their first welcome drink....down at the seaside...in the sunshine...And it's great for me to have Jean about as we can converse in a proper Dorset accent; not this silly broken Thai gibberish. Oooohhh Arrr, my loverly.

It's clear who wears the trousers in this household...here's Graham happily pushing the shopping trolley on their first exciting expedition to Tesco Lotus.

Golfing in Phuket is extremely popular and for the next week or so this Blog will be featuring golf. I know nothing about golf so this is a whole new world and a totally alien vocabulary to me. Two rounds of golf have already been played on two different golf courses and I shall be using the golfing quartet's own views to describe what the courses are like in the next Blog.

I have learnt quite a bit about golf already though. I have observed that a game requires at least two hours' preparation before leaving the house. There appears to be a strict ritual where couples go up and down the stairs a lot of times to gather a whole stack of equipment and then change the mind and take it back again...and then change the mind again and go and retrieve it. Changes of clothes, towels, various forms of make-up, bottles of water, white socks...etc etc etc. And it's very impressive to see how smartly a golfer dresses.....correct footwear, dinky little gloves...properly ironed shorts and shirt. I am impressed.

And each game also seems to requires an evening of discussion about tactics and who is going to win followed by an evening meal in which the tactics of the game just played are discussed and disputes over who did actually win are voiced.

It's amazing just how much can be said on the subject of the balls. I'm trying to work out how many words per hole a Lady Golfer gets through. Taking into account the previous evening's discussions, the two hours morning preparation, the drive to the course, the Game itself and then the post match analysis, my conclusion is that your average Lady Golfer needs 19, 603 words per hole.

Thanks to Jean and June, I am also getting the low down on a load of gossip about the ladies at the Weymouth Golf Club. I'm pleased to hear so much about my old teaching mate Elaine Rockingham. It's good to know that she is still dancing....and that a game of golf with her involves Dancing round the Course.

I can see I have much to learn about this game and all that goes with it. This week is going to be plenty of fun!!!!

John Gray Sea Canoe

2011-03-03T16:29:00.001-08:00

One of the lasting memories our friends take back home is of the day out with the John Gray Kayaking trip.

At midday a minibus arrives to pick everyone up for the hour's drive to the north eastern end of Phuket from where the 'mother boat' leaves. Guests are welcomed onboard with drinks and fruit and are given a briefing by the Thai crew who are keen to emphasise the respect they show to the National Park which is where the Kayaking takes place.

The idea is to use the kayaks to get through the narrow, low caves that lead into the centre of individual Karst (limestone mountains; remnants of a coral reef from 250 mill years ago???) formations. and see the stunning, pristine scenery inside them. Guests get into their kayaks or, in the case of Graham, are lowered by the ship's hoist (bless him; Graham remained in this position for the rest of the day) and away you go on an afternoon and evening of exploration.

June and Graham had a mischievous young Thai guide named Khun Rascal. There he is deliberately allowing his kayak to sink and showing how many tourists he's gonna get rid of this trip. June is up to her neck but luckily this photo was taken before the front of the kayak sank and June went with it. Graham, you will note, is frozen (unusual that in Thailand) in position and refuses to assist his Dear One.

It's not neccessary to steer by compass.....wherever your feet point, there you will go.

The gals, Cody and Chloe, had no problems at all with the kayaking....but Chloe was chatted up all day by their guide. He made me want to vomit so I have erased him from this photo....Khun Slick! I mean...here's an example. Khun Slick....'Are you feeling OK, Chloe?' Chloe.. 'Yeah????'. Khun Slick... 'You don't hurt?' Chloe... 'Nooooo????'. Khun S(l)ick... 'I think you must hurt....you drop from Heaven'. Urrrgggggggg. All day.......never ending stream of one liners...all out of well known songs. Excellent. Khun Slick....you are the one! Well Done! Chloe came back a changed gal!

Onto the serious stuff. These are the sort of nooks and crannies that the kayaks slip through.....excellent. You have to wait until the tide starts to drop and then lie virtually flat in the Kayak. Very painful to raise the head too high as there are sharp barnacles etc on the roof of the recently submerged cave. A month's intensive Limbo Dancing training would be good preparation for this particuar trip.

Here's a Kayak slipping through into the inner lagoon....

The trip consists of visiting three different karsts and entering their interiors. Each one is different with various animals (monkeys) and birds inside. Each is absolutely pristine...you really feel like you are the first people to ever go inside.....the nearest way to imagine how they look inside is to think 'Jurassic Park'....And the dinner on the boat is superb.

It was June and Graham's 44th Wedding Anniversary. 'The Jai' had arranged for the boat crew to present our Lovers with a nice bouquet whilst they were onboard.

If there's one trip that really stands out when you are here in Phuket.....then this is it. The crew are excellent fun. Very helpful; very funny....good lads. Brilliant.

Mutiny at Sea

2011-03-03T16:10:00.000-08:00

Captain Ta Wan, our illustrious longtail boat skipper, had an unusual dilemma on his hands when Mike 'Derby' Elvy decided he'd take over the helm.

Helming a longtail ain't the easiest thing in the world. There's a damn gurt 6 litre engine balanced on a pivot. The drive shaft leads down a long way to the propellor spinning dangerously close to the surface. You know what they're like...you've all seen the James Bond movies....extremely fast, very noisy....and that prop spinning out of water is a dangerous and nasty weapon. If you dig the prop in too deep then it's hard to hang on to the homemade tiller arm and keep the boat going in a straight line.....Derby was on the helm for a whole three waves until the boat veered off towards Africa and Captain Ta Wan had had enough and dragged us back on course.

Despite his utter incompentence, Derby was determined to show his Captaining Physique to the world (via this Blob; sorry I meant 'Blog') and has applied to be Daniel Craig's body double.

Well gals, what do you think??? Should Daniel be bothered????

The Cody and Chloe Show

2011-03-01T03:18:00.001-08:00

Today, at 0500, my two young diving stars left for Bangkok with Derby and Netty...and by now they'll be getting ready for the night boat trip down the Chao Praya River running through the middle of the City... But before they left we downloaded Cody's camera for the last time......

.....and here's some of the fish our ace photographer has been snapping......giant grouper...trevelly....

...and, of course, the occasional wandering turtle.

....and pretty little things...anemones...and dinky creatures such as ghost pipe fish....

...and the graceful batfish....

....the impressive lionfish....

..and everyone's favourite....the angel fish.

What a photographer Cody is.....she hopes to become a Marine Biologist and for sure she'll be good at it. Both she and sister Chloe will be sitting exams back in UK within two days!!! Good Luck, gals.....it was a pleasure meeting you and next year will be even more adventurous with our diving!!!

FISHING

2011-02-26T17:39:00.000-08:00

Yesterday we were freshwater fishing at Phuket Fishing Park....which isn't a 'park' but a nice lake surrounded by trees and with little bamboo shelters to relax and have lunch in.

We were honoured to have Mr Roger Bazand in our company. Roger, a legend in his own angling lifetime, had heard about the lake fishing here whilst lazing about in his Australian retirement home and popped over to Phuket to join us for a few days ...that's the sort of chap he is. And, of course, he caught the first fish....a nice carp...which he tells us are considered vermin in Australia and are responsible for killing off many of the indigineous species over there. Thus, when caught, they are removed from that particular stretch of Aussie water and made into Castlemaine XXXX and exported back to Europe (or Asia!).

Ace angler Derby retaliated immediately with a catfish. In fact, sad to tell you all, Derby hammered the fish and caught more than anyone else has this year. He gathered an audience of adoring fans around him, watching in awe as he banged in a steady supply of carp and catfish....and they were of a Good Stamp of fish too! One of Derby's admirers in in the final photo of this Blog entry.

Derby's papa, Graham, had never fished before but after catching the surrounding scrubs and nearby small children several times, he got the hand of actually getting the bait into the water and in one piece. And then the Derby genes took over and the fish started coming. Here's Graham with his first ever hard fighting Siamese Carp. You never forget your first ever fish!! Congratulations, Graham.

Doesn't matter where Roger is....the fish recognise a true master of his art....these catfish are very aggressive fighters all the way to the net but no match for Roger's consumate skills.

Pleasant scenery, colourful plants, sunny weather, bit of a welcome breeze, great company, plenty of fish.......as Mr Caines often says 'We're pissed off being so happy!'

Aha, the Derby with another carp.

....and with another catfish.....

And here's Whittall...doing the usual thing...running round after his demanding customers and netting their fish for them...this was a nice catfish coming to Graham's rod.

Here's Graham with another finely conditioned carp...I am convinced the pellets they feed the fish in this lake are actually steroids....these fish are manic when they fight....

And Derby gets the most fish and the biggest fish...even beating King Roger. How does he do it????

Derby's fan club gathers round him....see how impressed this water buffalo is? That's the effect our Derby has.

Just read and admire, lads...read and admire!

GAN ENG

2011-02-26T17:17:00.000-08:00

To celebrate 44 years of married bliss...June and Graham Elvy took us all out to the famous Gang Eng restaurant in Chalong.

June, a perfect example of British decorum at its very best.....

Graham.....a shining specimen of an English Gentleman....

Jai...doesn't care what we say about her as long as she's got a mouth full of spicy stuff....

Netty....carefully inspecting her noodles incase something has fallen out of the tree into them....

Chloe...anxiously looking around to spot the next would be romancer....she's endured some real classy chat up lines this holiday from the Thai chaps who seem to think she's an 'angel fallen from heaven'. Bless. Not Angles, but Angels...

Our waiter was a bit of a scamp....he wanted to clout Derby round the ear'ole for mucking him about....but was a bit wary as we told him Derby was European Muay Thai Champion..

And here's Cody on the left....Cody doesn't appear in too many pics as she's the one running around with the camera.... and here's the Ladies of the Family....three generations celebrating our illustrious June and Graham's lengthy achievement.

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!!

Thailand...Land of Smiles

2011-02-24T03:18:00.000-08:00

Apart from being a naturally gifted scuba diver and fish identifier extraordinaire, our Cody is a pretty ace photographer too. Trouble is everywhere in Phuket is sooooo photogenic you just can't help yourself....you HAVE to keep taking photo's!!

The family hired Captain Ta Wan for the day to take them sight seeing to a couple of offshore islands, lunch on one of them and plenty of snorkling in calm waters with great viz and stacks of fish.

Yep, this really is the sea...and it is genuinely flat calm. Just reach over the side of the boat and feed the fish!

Look at it!!! It is all just so scenic.........lovely islands, lovely beaches, crystal clear water, hot, sunny.....I mean, what ARE you doing back there in UK???? This is too good to miss.....you GOT to come here for some time in the winter....

The islands above are just screaming out to be dived....there's so many dive sites to explore. And because we have our own stuff for you to borrow at the house, we can just charter a local boat and go anywhere without lots of PADI divers jumping on your head....it IS paradise.

Chloe (left) and Cody (R) have been great. They are smashing young people....a great credit to their mama....and just look at the smiling Elvy's below....you just couldn't wish for a nicer family to have on holiday...a real pleasure to be with.

And here we are at the end of another perfect day....down at one of our favourite restaurants at the water's edge...waiting for the prawns and lobsters to be served up...and they're all still smiling away (yeah, even the lobsters are smiling).

Thailand is known as the 'Land of Smiles'...it's certainly worked its magic on our happy holiday makers!!!

Diving with Cody and Chloe

2011-02-23T22:47:00.001-08:00

After several training sessions in the pool, some theory work and the PADI video, we were ready for our first shore dive.

Here's the ladies in the sea doing the Buddy Check......and now we're dropping down!

Coming to the bottom.............

The very first sights are the first dive are never forgotten........

Nice reef edges, drop offs and colourful individual creatures like this sea urchin

Many kinds of different corals...........

Tiny fish set against a background full of little nooks and crannies which are packed with life...

Loads of different speices of fish to delight our trainee Marine Biologist, Cody.

More corals and various coral eating fish hiding amongst them

Impressive how gals use so little air......this, the very first dive, lasted 65 minutes with plenty of air left in the tanks.

We aim to repeat this later in the week..............today the Team have gone kayaking up in the north east of Phuket.............

Derbies on Hols (Part 2)

2011-02-21T04:07:00.000-08:00

Chloe decided that all this lazing about was no good for a finely tuned gymnast like herself....so she purchased the nearest thing she could find to do that hoola hoop type stuff gals like doing.

Cody was extremely impressed with her younger sister's eagerness for physical activity and joined in with the highly strenuous old 'thumbs up' routine.

After the morning's aerobics on the beach, it was back for a quick shower and photo session on the house (great how the plants are all getting a grip now all around the lagoon) before leaving for the Big Buddha trip and elephant riding.

Lagoon surrounding looking very nice now.

Mahoot Michael impresses with Cody on the way to handle an elephant.

Neti and Chloe took a more leisurely approach to the ride....Mahoot Mike and Circus Trainer Cody completed three laps though the jungle to Neti and Chloe's one..

Here's Mike and Cody re-emerging through the bush after their final circuit which included a couple of jumps as well.

After the elephants...it was on to the Big Buddha project.

The Big Buddha project is coming on very quickly. Every trip sees changes...new statues, new buildings...

The scaffolding has all been removed now so the Big Buddha is starting to look very splendid.

The various Buddha images are becoming more artisitically placed for visitors to see.

Chloe has decided she's not leaving Thailand and is going to buy the house next door. Seriously, the World Economy is in such a dire strait that many building projects have ground to a halt and there are some drastic price reductions to clear bank loans etc etc.

The house next door to me was priced at 20 million Baht. We are currently getting about 50 Baht to the £1...so 20 million is serious money...£400,000. But, I was told today that one house must be sold for the Company's immediate financial needs and will drop next door to 12 million Baht....£240,000!! Big drop of 160,000 and the house is massive (4 double bedrooms, five bathrooms) with a great swimming pool. So...here's a golden opportunity to grab what is a very good bargain. No, I can't buy it.....the Jai and I are involved in another little two house building project near to the new marina being built in Chalong....so all those thinking I am a lucky lucky bugga, now's your chance to become one too!!!!

And how have our action loving family managing to do so much whilst we were scurrying around Grunteb?? They cleverly hired Gai as their chauffeur and she took them all over the place...so a big thankyou to Gai!!!!!!!!

The Derbies Arrive

2011-02-21T03:34:00.001-08:00

Wow! We've been busy, busy, busy.....no time for Blog writing.

While The Jai and I were on City Tour with Mike's Mama, June, and Papa Graham, the Derbies had arived.....and there's 423 photo's on just one of the four cameras to prove it! So, here's a little run down.....

Mike, Neti, Cody, Chloey (hereafter referred to as M and Co) arrived at the mansion...made appropriate greetings to the Spirit in the Spirit House and then advanced to the pool....

The Young(ish) lovers pampering each other in warm water....

...and getting ready for their first night out in Phuket.

Next day, it was straight down to the beach. Sizzling sun, pure white sands, crystal clear water, sunbeds, umbrellas and coconut drinks...here's Chloe giving her straw some serious activity.

Cody soon got into the swing of strenous activity whilst on holiday.

Mike was missing the UK weather and Ska music.....so got into the 'Brit on Holiday' pose to show he wasn't one for the locals to mess with.....

Neti had found one of the deserts Mandy had missed....small miracle

Aah...the Promthep Point sunsets....

Sun dropping into the sea for the end to the first perfect day in Paradise

BANGKOK

2011-02-18T05:04:00.000-08:00

Bangkok is an amazing City but is can seem overwhelming and daunting for people visiting for the first time. We are lucky because we have 'The Jai' to guide us everywhere and to argue with every Thai person over the prices they want to charge for various things....

Any trip to Bangkok requires a visit to The Grand Palace....so here's a few photo's taken by Derby's mama, June. June explained that she had spent many happy hours with her dad in his darkroom as a child....developing things. And now she is a keen photographer with an eagle eye for composition and the obscure technicalities of enhanced digital photography. What a pleasure to have an artiste amongst us at last....

This Yak, one of the guardians of the Temple, has that look on his face I have seen so many times on my anglers' faces when they have lost yet another fish.

Amazing buildings.....everything in the Grand Palace demands to be photographed.

Here's Derby's Mama and Papa, Graham and June, showing what true and lasting romance is all about in the City of Angels.

(Bangkok is called Gruntep by the Thais...which means City of Angels)

The Buddha images are fabulously ornate

This is Wat Arun or the Temple of the Dawn as seen from the river......and the Chinese Giants are guarding the entrance to Wat Po which is where many people go to learn correct massage techniques.

We've just got back to Phuket after four very hectic days of sightseeing, river cruises, fabulous dinners out, evening shows.....and of course, for The Jai and me.....the Eric Clapton concert at the Impact Arena in Bangkok.

And yes, it IS true...Eric is definitely God!!.....what a concert!!!

And....within minutes of arriving back...I discover I have two keen scuba diving students waiting to get into action....hooray!!!! We started the pool training already.....more tomorrow!

Breakfast with our neighbours.

2011-02-12T20:05:00.000-08:00

Gary and Mandy left us at 0500 this morning. There wasn't much point going back to bed as
The Jai and me were being taken out to an early breakfast!!

Behind the house, some very serious construction work is going on. A dam is being built and reservoirs being prepared. The three year plan is establish a large area of man made lake which will supply water for this part of Phuket but will also provide angling and sailing. It's an ambitious project but it's well under way. This will mean we have golf already next door and then two additional activities to offer as well as being close to two main temples. There is also a Nature Trail and the elephant safari has returned. We have been very fortunate in buying the house in this particular location with so much going on.

Today a new Thai house was being blessed. The house is built as a 'summer retreat' for the Village Leader, Khun Poo Yai, and his family. Because of the Temple guide book I have written, I have met a lot of Thai people and, because of this particular family's status, the Head Monk of the area, Pra Maha Pongsak, was to be one of the five monks giving the house blessing. I am due to hand over the Guide booklet officially tomorrow to Pra Maha Pongsak so it was also a good time to meet him on an informal basis.

The new house, which the family tell me will be available for us ('us' being you guys coming to stay) if we wanted a little adventure and spend a night up in the Nagerd Mountains enjoying fantastic views down to Chalong Bay, is set amongst a lot of mountainside land. There are many fruit trees and plants already well established including banana trees. Many of the things we enjoyed for breakfast came from the garden.

Family is very important to Thai people. They are a very close knit society and love to cook and eat together. There was cooking taking place under the house as well as in the actual building.

Wat Chalong has just finished its annual 10 day Festival. It's a massive affair with hundreds of stalls and thousands of people attending every night. This gentleman, Khun Rasada, was elected by the people in Phuket to be the Chief Organiser of this prestigeous event. He told me (in Thai, of course) that he was....knackered!!! (Please don't re-elect me next year for this job)

The ladies are cooking under the shade of the house. Many Thai houses are built on wooden 'stilts' or concrete pillars. This keeps the property safe from ravaging King Cobras, highly toxic scorpions, the Greater Banana Bunion eater and other such highly dangerous animals that scurry about on the forest floor. We don't get to see any of these things in this house as Thai creatures don't think much of Ferangs (foreigners). But, with the house set up on some sort of structure, there is a big shaded area underneath...ideal for cooking ...as long as you don't set fire to the wooden floors overhead.

Thai food is justly renown for its colour, variety of tastes and freshness. Breakfast included many different dishes. Thai style is to fill the table with many different foods and everyone helps themselves to a bit of everything....different to Western Style when you have your own 'choice' put on your own plate and just eat that.

Down under the house, the food was still being cooked and sent up to the VIP lounge above!! Jai and I were up there being treated very well indeed.

On the left is Khun Poo Yai. He is the Village Chief and a man of massive importance and influence. His family own stacks of land including the land that the Phuket Nature Home project is built on which he sold at a monstrous profit. In the middle is Khun Gai who was one of the first Thai men I met here. He is part of this large family and has a few shops and resturants as well as several houses 'up the mountain'...then there is the visiting low life charter skipper, Whittall, and the famous crewperson, The Jai.

Thais believe that if you do good and if you think good, then good will come to you in return. The reason for writing the Guide Book was because there's very little explained in the English Language in Wat Chalong and it is a fascinating place. So, it made sense for me to write a guide booklet in English and hopefully provide some insight into Thai Temple Culture and Thai culture in general for English speaking people. The booklet has been very well received and it is as a result of it that I am having the opportunity to meet many members of the local Thai society that I would not normally have had. They are very pleased that a Foreigner is interested in their culture and motivated enough to write a little book about it. So, because I have 'done good', I am certainly getting plenty of 'good' back!

All good fun......................

And now Jai and I have 2 days to clean the house from top to bottom (well, Jai and her Thai lady friends as I do not intend to do any house work now I am so important...ha ha ha) before we fly to Bangkok on Tuesday. There we are meeting Derby's mama and papa and staying with them for four days to provide a Bangkok City Tour! It will be good. Jai knows the City inside out and we will be able to provide our guests with a memorable experience....and me and The Jai are going to see Eric Clapton in Bangkok on 16th!! Yeah.....'she don't lie, she don't lie, she don't lie.....Cocaine...'.

Meanwhile, when we arrive in Bangkok, Derby himself arrives at exactly the same time in Phuket airport....pretty clever timing, eh? Crafty buggar...leaving me and Jai to look after his mum and dad while he and his partner and daughters swan about the pool and beaches.....

Yo Ho.....better get the dustpan out now...and pass it to one of the many Thai ladies laughing at me.

Scuba Diving at Kata Reef

2011-02-12T19:52:00.001-08:00

After three weeks of coughing and choking (we put it down to the effects of hair spray Gary has been using since Christmas), Mandy finally felt up to having a dive....with just two days of her holdiay left!

Here we are...reminding ourselves how to put the diving bits together before braving the challenging conditions of the sea at Kata Beach. Current water temperature is....32 degrees!!!! Bit chilly, eh?

It's been so long since we've been diving that Mandy and I weren't sure if we had to go up or down. Here we are discussing the merits of going up.

Kata Beach reef is jammed pack full of life. It's a great place to have a very easy but very scenic dive. There's lots of things to see that cannot be seen easily found on the offshore dive sites. We were very fortunate to watch a family of the rarely seen Leaf Fish...fascinating fish that are very hard to tell apart from a submerged blade of grass or slender leaf.

There's always a large puffer fish lurking under a bit of coral.....

There's always the need for caution which is why it's important to maintain buoyancy control and keep a few feet off the bottom....you don't want to land on these buggars as they sting...badly; VERY badly...and the stone fish is brilliant at camouflage.

It's a case of 'Hello, Goodbye' for Mandy's diving this year....bit of a nuisance getting a heavy cold.....not good for diving. I wonder if Mike's family will be courageous enough to don the gear...or will it be ice-creams around the pool all day???? If so, I will have to join the PADI boats and go to sea....gotta get some dives in!!!!

Horst and the Anglers.

2011-02-11T04:13:00.001-08:00

Here is Mr Horst Sneider. You anglers, who are very keen on your angling hobby and read all the magazines, keeping up to date with all the latest tackle trends and the 'who's who' in the angling world will of course recognise Horst.

Horst is the President of EFSA which is, again as you all know...so apologies for unneccessarily pointing it out...the European Federation of Sea Anglers. This year, in September, the EFSA Boat Championships will be held in Weymouth which is a great honour for the port and one of the reasons why the Weymouth boats are so busy this year. Apart from a three week pre-Olympic practice run, there are also 4 other major angling events taking place.....so 8 weeks of the season were already accounted for with the bookings made last year.

(Next year will be almost as busy...so be prepared to get your bookings in early!!!)

Horst and I plus two of our guests staying in March will be embarking on a three day Similan Island trip. That will be a great one to write about. Horst and I are also taking part in a 2 day competition at the end of February. We have Mike the Derby arriving next week. He's a very good angler....I am hoping he will join us but Gary tells me 'fat chance' .....watch this space. Will he be allowed to come...or not???? Bets taken. Add your comments below this blog.

Anyhow, to seal our fishing plans Horst, Mandy, Gary, The Jai and me celebrated by ordering even more prawns and beer than normal and settled down to making ourselves as unable to move as possible.

Puddings...Thai Style...

We chaps, you understand lads, are limited in what we can eat. Not so the ladies. Puddings are a bit impressive in Thailand.....above are two of the creations that Mandy managed to demolish. Note how she is keeping a very wary eye on anyone daring to come too near....and nick anything off her!!!!! Jai had scurried off with hers and was eating behind some old shack somewhere......

aahhhh...Fireworks

2011-02-11T04:00:00.001-08:00

Fireworks.....too hard to capture them on dinky travel cameras..........

The 10 Festival at Wat Chalong (local Temple) concluded with a 45 minute spectacular firework display.

If a wealthy society shows its wealth through culture, then Thailand is rich indeed. Wealthy people like to show their wealth in Asian society through their generousity 'for the people'. One generous man bought 2,000 fireworks...big ones....from Thailand's award winning firework display company to round off the Festival.

Under advice from a local Thai family who own most of the hill behind us and the collection of rather exotic Thai style houses nestling on it, we made our way up the hillside to be greeted with free beers and a splendid view of the Wat Chalong grounds. Much better than being in the temple with 92 million other people!!!!

OK....the photographs do not do the display justice in any way....but it was a terrific sight and the fireworks were amazing!!

Rivers, streams, mountains.....

2011-02-11T03:06:00.001-08:00

A few more photo's of Koh Sok National Park and Chlewlam Dam

Park accommodation..............

Jai...found hanging over a river. Ah, Thai gals, eh?

Boat Taxi in the morning mist.................................and, above right, showering...Thai Style

Mountains................lakes............scenery.............

CHEOW LAN LAKE

2011-02-08T01:05:00.000-08:00

The Cheow Lan Lake was formed in the 1980's when the Khlong Saeng river was damned to power a new H.E.P. Now this enormous 28 km long lake is dotted by over 100 islands and its forested shore provides sanctuary to many species of birds and some primates, especially gibbons.

The lake also contains 8 floating villages with a range of accommodation within each. It was our intention to go right back to basics....and we did!! Here's our floating shack with the Grand Shack Master, Mr Gary Chard presiding over his new Kingdom.

Our morning lake safari started at 0600. After a gentle hike through densely jungled mountaineous terrain, we ended up standing on a pile of bamboo poles lashed together and called a raft.

This was to be our craft to take us to the famous Cheow Lan Cave.

Our guide, Khun Lac, kept a wary eye on The Gary who threatened to knock her overboard everytime he stretched.

One of the rafts was in for repair. Here's a Lakeside Mechanic tying it back together.

Our raft Captain had the latest in Hydraulic Seats....a set of scales. The scales indicated that he weighed 11Kg. When asked where he got this fine set of inaccurate Salter top price scales from, our Captain explained they came direct from Weyfish and had not been tampered with since leaving Weymouth. (??????)

Early morning scenery at the lake is very impressive with low lying cloud shrouding the Karsts.

Nice, eh?

The Karsts have small cavelets along the current water line....but dramatic caves have been carved out by water action and have produced some pretty amazing natural sculptures inside....

Every culture sees different things in Nature. In Thailand everything is either a monkey, an elephant, a naga (serpent), a garuda or some other strange creature from Thai mythology. Not too sure what this particular one is other than a spectacular bit of water carving on limestone deposits.

This sculpture was so thin that a light held behind it made the whole structure glow. This fragile waterfall like carving was over 50' high....an amazing sight.

Here are two of the intrepid explorers with our cave guide. This gives an ideas of the scale of the formations.

Our two Hollywood stars chill out on the way back across the lake to the dam.

The whole area is very photogenic and, as is the case with digital photography, we have at least 11 million photographs by now....but these are just a few to give a general idea of this little adventure.

I can see this becoming a favourite place to take you all if you have time!!! Very nice!

Pigeon Pie

2011-02-07T08:28:00.000-08:00

The Thai word for Adventure is Pajonpai. Gary refuses to accept this and calls it Pigeon Pie...so here is the latest 'Pigeon Pie'!

It was about time we left the 'lap of luxury' and return to basics and Nature. So we set off to the Koh Sok National Park which is about 120 miles north of Chalong and 100 km north of Phuket.

The park is enormous and is set in the heart of one of the last remaining rain forests in Thailand which features imposing Karst mountain formations running through it. According to the literature, these mountains are the remains of an enormous coral reef formed 250 million years ago. The 'reef' runs from China, then through the north eastern section of Vietnam in the famous Halong Bay and southwards into the Gulf of Thailand. The Karsts break out of the sea all down the eastern coastline of Thailand heading southwards and then heading to the south west across to Phuket and down to Krabi.

The accommodation in the park consists of 'tree houses' set right in the forest. It's nice to sit out on the balconies and listen to the many sounds of nature as the forest is full of various species of birds and monkeys especially gibbons.

As in all nature watching, it's all about being quiet and still and keeping a sharp eye out. The house balconies are good view points (this is the view from our our balcony) so it is possible to see animals especially early morning.

Some of the park has been replanted for rubber trees. The resin runs down the tree into the little cups and collects as the white, smelly stuff that will become rubber.

The forest is full of bamboo. It is a known fact that if a Thai person does nothing for 17 seconds they will fall alseep. The Jai can sleep anywhere.....here she is the land of dreams (Thais dream of elephants, snakes, monkeys and spirits) whilst we were enjoying a swim in the river.

Aha....The Jai is now awake and supported by two park visitors.

Food was available in simple little resturants which offered Bar B Q'd fish and chicken dishes. Our evening meal (which was delicious) cost us £15 for the four of us....and that included the beers!

Koh Sok was just a stopping point for us as our main adventure was yet to come at the Cheow Lan Lake about 50km further east......tomorrow's Blog will be about that as we are now off out to Wat Chalong, the nearby Temple, which is holding its annual festival this week.

Chase away those winter blues

2011-02-01T03:37:00.000-08:00

Some sunny type photo's to chase away the Winter Blues

I've looked at the UK forecast today and it ain't pretty, so I know you all need cheering up with a few photo's of a nice little resort we have discovered near to the house and which is open non residents.

Friendship Beach....nice name....is right on the sea with clear views to the nearby islands. There's a good pool which non- residents are also welcome to use, a resturant with a cheap but very good varied menu and, in the evenings, live music.

Here's Mandy posing with the sea and an island in the background...........

If you are reading this and cursing away 'cos of the weather you are suffering....then come here next season!! There's really no excuse or reason to suffer the cold.....you cannot get a cheaper holiday than this!!!

Patong is stacked with clubs playing live music...and it's very high quality stuff. Last night we visited Rock City and stayed for three hours of very loud, hefty rock...brilliant. Guns and Roses, AC/DC, Metallica, Rage Against the Machine....even a bit of Seal!

For those of you who cannot stand adrenelin creating, all action, get on your feet stuff then there is a Line Dancing Bar down the road or even some of that soppy Stick-Yer -Finger- in -your- ear type folkie music stuff nearby.

Molly Malone's Irish Bar will be our next visit. They have some great Irish bands there.....violins, mandolins, Irish Pipes etc....all electrified of course and played at the sort of volume required to froth up the head of yer Guinness.

And what's this I hear you ask???? This is a new project which 'The Jai 'is doing. There is a new Marina to be built in Chalong which is the town 2 km away from us. Jai bought a plot of land one minute's walk from the sea and this is the first of two houses she is having made. She hasn't got enough dosh for the second house so that will have to be done in a couple of years. This will be up for long term rate at a very cheap price.....about £400 PER MONTH!!! It will have air conditioning, TV and Internet facilities and be fully kitted out with two bedrooms and three bathrooms.

So, if any of you wanted a real cheap deal...you could have two of you renting with a room each which = £50 per week for your accommodation...then you cannot get cheaper than this!!!

Simon Cabaret Show

2011-02-01T01:15:00.000-08:00

IT'S SHOW TIME!!!!!

Simon Cabaret Show, Patong, Phuket. Photo's courtesy of Super Snap Saranwalai Chansongsri, known in Paparrazi circles as 'The Jai'.

Mandy and Jai went to the Simon Cabaret show last night. This is a 90 minutes non-stop musical extraganza with the Ladyboys taking the audience on a musical tour of the world via the hits of famous female singers. The Introduction to the show tells you that this is going to be the best show of its kind you'll ever see.....and judging by the crowds the show pulls in with many people returning time and again.....then I guess they've got it dead right. There is no chance of getting in without pre-booking so that says a lot for the shows immense popularity.

After the show, there is the opportunity for the audience to meet and be photographed with members of the cast (note I choose my words well).

Here we have a charming visitor from Sweden flanked by two strapping Ladyboys.

And here (above) the gorgeous creature in pink is kindly pointing the way home to a bemused local lady.

C'mon, me dear, stop mucking about and get yer cash out...it's expected that 100 Baht is handed over to have your photo taken with any of these 'Ladies'.

Aha......Belles of the Ball....and the chap on the right (above) is in a Heaven of his own making with a magnificent replica of Lady Ga Ga on his right. Thailand has a reputation for Reconstructive/Plastic surgery second to none....judge for yourself, lads!!

And, as you say your farewells, the cast come out to wave you off.............

The Thai way to travel...into the Tuk Tuk and off to the depths of Patong to meet the lads for a Heavy Metal/Ear-drum numbing session in Rock City.

2011-01-31T02:02:00.001-08:00

Yo Ho......

Well, it's gone a bit quiet since our Bert has left us....so we have had to get our levels of energy restored and get hunting out some trips to do.

Today Mandy and Gary went off to find a couple of secluded beaches that are only accessible by 4 wheel drive (which we have) and I have been reading up stuff and looking on the Internet to find a good place for us all to visit.

And here it is.

http://www.khaolak.net/activities/khaolak-fishing.html

Scroll down to read the stuff about the lake fishing! Our plan is to charter a boat and head out to the floating bungalows (£12 per night to rent) and try a couple of days fishing. Apparently the scenery is amazing and there's plenty of wildlife about. Then morning starts when the gibbons start to howl!

The lake was created by a dam being built in 1980 which resulted in the flooding of villages. If you have your own gear (we have!) you can go Scuba Diving there....so that will be interesting.

Tonight the girls are off to see the Simon Cabaret Show (which is the Ladyboy show) in honour of the Great Bert. Gary and I are off to see a rock band in Patong....and the gals will join us there later.

Yo Ho...it's all go!!!

Bert's Departure

2011-01-28T20:37:00.000-08:00

Bert's plane doesn't leave for ages but he was so worried about Gary's lack of direction that he considered a three hour period to cover the 45 minute trip to the airport to be wise.

So, depending on the success of the journey, Bert will either be in downtown Madagascar by now or sitting in the Bill Bailey Bar in Phuket airport. Gary, we estimate, will take about 5 hours to return without Bert's navigating abiities to assist him.

Anyhow, here's a couple of photo's to reflect on Bert's stay with us. Here he is in donning scuba gear for the first time. We are proud to announce that Bert managed to reach the dizzy depths of nearly 3'' (in my swimming pool) before he decided that Scuba Diving was too emotionally disturbing for him. Scuba Diving is all about control of the mind......and as many of you have now gathered, Bert's mind, such as it is, tends to be on other matters.

We have discovered this week that Bert is a Ladyboy Magnet. Wherever we go, they seek him out....and that's not just because he's giving them the old 'come on'. When we were fishing at the lake, Bert was so concerned about any Ladyboys scaling the surrounding fence that Mandy had to agree to stay with him at all times to act as Bodyguard. Here they are keeping a wary eye on a lurking suspect.

We like Guy's Bar as it is a Lady Free zone......but Ladyboys still manage to sneak in for a quick game of pool. Bert was firmly into this game until Mandy gave him the nod that his opponent's name was Cornelius and 'her' feet were a good size 11 (always a giveaway Jai assures us). Those deep manly cries when 'her' balls were sunk also gave a faint hint of something amiss. Bert left early.

Phuket town is a rambling 'City' full of Portuguese Sino Art and Architecture. Currently there is a move towards trying to gain UN Heritage status for the town and then a major restoration programme of the magnificent buildings can be undertaken. Phuket Town is full of excellent resturants. Here we are at the Natural Resturant which is a building stuffed with character and which boasts an imaginative Thai food menu.

Bert, as usual, was involved in other activities whilst the rest of us enjoyed some terrific cuisine. Yes, it's a trainee Ladyboy....'she' was about 12 years old. At this point Mandy had to give Bert a bit of a stern lecture especially as the resturant staff were starting to give Bert some ominous stares. Bert said it was the best massage he'd ever had....altho' it only lasted a minute or three. And he was given a pretty rose to remember the occasion by.

Here we are just after dinner having a nice group photo taken....but where are Bert's eyes directed??? And what is that little gesture with the thumb that he thinks is going unnoticed????

Yep; he'd spotted another one....

However, this Ladyboy, didn't seem too enamoured. There appears to be a certain aura of mocking distain about 'her'.

Never wanting to miss the chance of

making a few Baht for the family, 'she' called over her 'sister'.

At this point even Bert went into a severe reaction!

As this is a family blog, I am not allowed to show the photo of what caused such an obvious gesture of surrender.

Bert, on our last evening meal together, finally gave up the struggle and admitted he was no match for the Ladyboys of Phuket!!

'THEY SEEK HIM HERE; THEY SEEK HIM THERE...THOSE LADY BOYS SEEK BERT EVERYWHERE...XXXX

Sea Fishing trip

2011-01-28T19:20:00.000-08:00

Sea Fishing trip from Chalong.

Yesterday we tried a sea fishing trip. Two years ago Gary and Bert used one of the top level Game boats costing nearly £1k for the day. This year they used a local 'wooden warrior' costing £200 for the day which did exactly the same sort of day...with the same results.....very little!!

Here's Bert relaxing on the way out to sea....we're just going past Promthep Point which is about the best shore fishing mark we have found. Lots of species there but nothing of any size...

The lads are settled down on the trolling session. Bert had just landed a tuna but the very efficient crew lad had the fish off and in the fish box before I could get a photo.

We had a very good skipper (Captian Ali...only 25 but very good English and good fun) and crewman Marteb. Marteb was a real grafter and worked hard to keep the six trolling sets working properly. As always with trolling, the angler hardly ever touches the gear....just to wind a fish (if lucky) in.

Here's one of the tuna........

The day's programme goes like this....leave about 0900 -ish...head out towards the offshore islands as the trolling sets are played out and go trolling (no success) for a couple of hours. When we reached Racha Yai, the current most 'productive' island, we switched to 3 hook paternoster rigs baited with squid strips and fished with handlines on the drift. Our skipper and crew joined in and they had five little fish between them whilst Bert and Gary managed two. After an hour of this we headed into Racha Yai Bay for a swim whilst the skipper and crew cooked up the fish we'd caught for lunch. Racha Yai Bay has very good viz and many fish could be seen while snorkling.....but mainly all little fish.

The crew had heard about Bert's preferences for Ladyboys and did a nice little dance to attract his attention. But Bert's eyes were fixed on our rugged, pirate like Captain.

After lunch we headed back out to sea for a couple hours more trolling which is when the couple of tuna were caught.

Fishing always turns me to fags (Bert likes that word) die to the excitement of trolling.

We returned to port about 6 ish.

Our skipper explained the lack of fish was due to wind conditions, excessive rain and generally poor fishing for the past three days which, when pressed, extended to the 'past two years'. Whenever I fish abroad, and I admit my experience is VERY limited, I always think how lucky we are back in UK with what we have on offer. Our fishing is infinitely better than Phuket's fishing....but for all that, it's a nice day out.

Next month our planned 3 day Similan Island trips will begin....I do believe that we will have decent fishing there so I am looking forward to that. Also, according to the charts, there is a 100 metre drop off down to 150 metres about 24 miles directly west of Phuket. The boats that make that journey cost in the region of £2k per day!!! Back in UK we think nothing of going 25 miles out....and fuel here in Thailand is capped by the Government and is much cheaper than ours.

2011-01-27T02:55:00.000-08:00

Thai Cuisine

Thai food is world famous for its variety, colour, freshness and spice! Down at the Sea Gypsy village in Rawai there is a small but bustling fish market where the day's catch can be purchased as soon as it is landed. In between the fresh fish stalls are several fresh vegetable/spice stalls from where a fabulous selection of local produce is available.

The colourful spices and vegetables are there for us to choose.

Across the street are resturants where you can take your choice of fish to be Bar-B-Q'd

One firm favourite is the King Prawns. A kilo of these delicious critters is 700 Baht (£14) for the gigantic ones and 350 Baht (£7) per kg for the smaller ones which are about three times the size of ours back home. There were 5 of us....so 2 kg seemed about the right amount...but you can always go back for more!

Here the team are waiting (impatiently) for the prawns to arrive.

Gary hadn't noticed that the prawns had been delivered and was busy licking the spicey sauce off his plate.

Gary noticed the prawns had arrived! Remember that animated film 'Finding Nemo'? The seagulls? 'Mine, Mine, Mine....'

Bert, Jai, Mandy and I were allowed one prawn each tho' so I don't want any of you lot out there reading this saying that our Main Man ain't a generous one!!

But what a treat. This is what this holiday is all about. Be a bit brave! Be adventurous! Thai's are meticulously clean and hygenic. You can eat at their little roadside stalls with confidence. An opportunity such as this one with all the fish and spices laid out fresh before you has to be grabbed.

Luch cost £15 for the prawns and £5 for the beers and cooking cost = £4 each!! Not bad, eh??

A truly memorable experience and one which I hope many of you coming over will enjoy......

2011-01-27T02:13:00.000-08:00

Windy in Phuket...........

Today our intrepid explorers set off for Dragon Island on a longtail boat from Rawai. Sea conditions were very choppy with a force 5 to 6 blowing and the boat having to travel head to wind to reach the selected island.

Breezy conditions! Choppy seas.

45 minutes later our team arrived....soaked to the skin and having been treated to a barrage of good old Anglo Saxon vocabulary via Gary who held Bert directly responsible for the idea of the trip, the wind conditions, the wetness of the sea, the direction of travel, the length of passage etc etc. (You get the picture?)

The longtail boats were bouncing about on the sea....but after a voyage of trepidation and stamina....the team arrived at Dragon Island.

The team rushed up the beach ready to confront the Dragons.

And sure enough, the Dragons emerged from the undergrowth. They are not excessively dangerous although they have been known to snatch little kids off their motor bikes.

The Dragons are particularly partial to Singha beer and honey pancakes. There were signs everywhere to make sure you didn't keep your hands attached to anything you were eating or drinking when the beasts approached.

The Kink Dragon, a magnificent specimen in comparison to his smaller females, lazed nonchanantly in a nearby shelter daring any tourists to come and get their drinks back.

A formidable beast indeed.

The return to Rawai was slightly less wet....the team were headed towards the Sea Gypsy Village and a feast of fresh prawns that would have just been landed.......

Phuket Fishing Park

2011-01-25T19:11:00.000-08:00

Phuket Fishing Park

Phuket Fishing Park has been a real

great find for us. We are enjoying
some terrific fishing.....just take a look at these cracking fish!!

The location is scenic and has little bamboo shelters around it. Lunch and drinks will be brought to you as required.

Today the lads took on the gals. We were not concerned about the fact that we lads were superior in numbers (3) compared to the Lady's team (2). We were confident we could overcome such obvious disadvantages in our 'Numbers of Fish Caught' competition.

Oh dear, wrong again! We hadn't reckoned on our 'Fishing Virgin'
Mandy possessing such a hidden

talent. Here she is playing her first ever fish.....and these fish go crazy
with an extremely powerful fight.

Of course Gary was there to retaliate with a fine catfish........

Sneakily, the gals had the secret weapon in the Demon Fish Catcher known as 'The Jai'. Jai was soon into a hefty Siamese Carp to put the gals back in the lead.

But our trusty Bert 'el Brick was soon into one to level the scores.

Here's Bert with another good catfish........... he caught two!

And, supporting the lads with the day's biggest fish...Whittall of Weymouth!!!!
But we chaps had no chance. Those gals raced away with it....again!!!! The ladies totalled 9 fish and we three professional anglers caught five between us!!! Whittall was the most useless catching just one fish.

Interestingly our guide explained that the overcast conditions (which we chose as we thought they would be better for fishing) always resulted in a 'quiet' day. The best days are when there is no wind and the sun is blazing down! You see, it's always East and West...total opposites all the time. But it was terrific fun. We saw stacks of fish rising in front of us and often jumping clear of the water just a couple of feet in front of us.

This lake is going to provide all of you who come with some fishing you are never going to forget. It is amazing!!!

Sunshine Bar

2011-01-23T02:50:00.000-08:00

This week the local weekly newspaper, The Phuket Gazette, carries the story of a police clampdown on bars and nightclubs in the Rawai area....our favourite nightly haunt.

Apparently everywhere 'open' is supposed to shut down at 0100 whilst enclosed venues can go on until 0200.

This has come as a great shock to everyone as we are all used to the bars staying open until all the customers had left...whatever time that might be. The owner of the Sunshine Bar, a particular favourite spot, had just been released after sweating it out for a couple of days in Phuket jail along with several there other local bar owners. Not a pleasant experience but nothing seems to stop Thai people smiling...in fact the photo in the newspaper shows the Sunshine Bar owner smiling away as she was being arrested.

Because of these ongoing events, Simone, the boss, (quite a few of the staff in the Sunshine Bar is a Ladyboy) put Mandy on watch in case the Unformed Ones made a sneaky return. Her job was to ring the Scatter Bell if her suspicions were aroused and the staff could then hot foot it into the Sauna establishment next door leaving the clientel carrying on as normal. Hopefully, the customers would be not be arrested!

With Mandy on guard and Jai locked up back home, Whittall was able to enjoy a daliance with his favourite Ladyboy, Martine. Scrummy!!

Bert refused to take part in any of this Ladyboy stuff...he's a bit of a coy chap you understand...and went off to play a game of pool totally on his own.

But, as the evening warmed up...even Bert got into the action and had a go at climbing the Bar Pole. Unfortunately this was the wrong one and has splinters. The metal one that everyone else was shimming up and down (before Gary bent it) was behind the bar.

The Sunshine Bar is a real fun place. It's always full with lots of different Nationalities having a good time together....it's what Phuket is all about; fun and friendship.

Fishing Expedition to Rawai

2011-01-23T02:40:00.000-08:00

Fishing in Phuket

Tomorrow the Gary/Bert team start to hit the Rawai sea angling scene. The tackle has been purchased; the bait ordered and the venue selected. Today was spent on investigating the chosen venue.

Gary and Mandy went to take a look first with their own unique approach......

Then the boys picked the local knowledge of a resident German angler who fishes the pier daily. They spoke together for nearly 11 seconds.

As a resut of their investigations, Gary has decided the old Weymouth ways are best and brought out his second suitcase loaded with his favourite tackle. This small string will be baited and laid along the Rawai pier tomorrow. That should make the locals happy!

We wait with baited breath for tomorrow's debrief.

Today; Sat 22nd January

2011-01-21T23:01:00.000-08:00

Well, what an action packed start to the day!

Today...up early....and then off to the nearby big swimming pool. The team are determined to try to get a bit fitter!! The aim was to do 20 lengths of the 25 metre pool each. Bert managed 4 and a half lengths plus 2 attempts to clear the pool length underwater....managed 3/4 which ain't bad for a first attempt!! Mandy, 42 lengths (swims like a barracuda); Gary half a width; Jai...tried to break Ai 's (see Face book under Ai Futaki) new record....and only failed by 99 yards...so, very close.

When she was here, Selena and husband Kevin researched and then tried out some new resturants and discovered some really good ones. After swimming, we all headed off to the nearby Wine Connection Bistro for a superb breakfast costing a whole £3!! Well Done, Selena and Kevin for discovering this gem.

And then back to the house pool for a bit of R and R. Mandy is photographed checking to see if Gary is still alive after his half width exertions. You may suggest your own caption for this photo...prizes will be awarded.

After a bit of time in the pool, Bert noticed some hefty swirls in the lagoon behind the house so our lads were soon alert and into action doing what they do best....fishing. Right now they are out there trying to catch the fish and I've just heard Bert shout out that he's 'dropped it'...so they have had the monster on...which is a start.

I ain't too sure what they think is out there but I know for sure our Thai pool cleaner is more likely to catch it with his special 'suck it in' tackle. Here he is, behind our two heroes, setting up his own special hosepipe rig which I suspect he lays out close to the quarry and then sucks in like buggery....who knows if this will work???

And just a quick photo from last night's 'Meet the Neighbours/Welcome to Phuket' gathering. Gary has announced that he is having nothing to do with Ladyboys this year and refuses to go to the Simon Lady Boy Cabaret show in Patong. Then, shortly after this announcement, Gary emerges from the tropical garden with a headpiece Danny La Rue would be proud of.

You just never know what that wag, Gary, will get up to next!

And now a bit of seriousness...if you have Facebook...look up Ai Futaki. Ai is a young Japanese lady who has been friends with son Tom and me for the past eight years. I first met Ai in Koh Toa when she was learning, along with Tom, to be a PADI diving instructor. They teamed up again to become Free Diving Instructors and the following year (2008), Ai supported Tom in Koh Lanta, to the south of Phuket, when he won an International Freediving event with 3 dives to 50m (yes, 50 metres...no scuba tank!) and breath holding for up to 5 mins 30 secs. Anyhow, Ai is a brilliant lady; extremely driven, highly skilled, very intelligent, fabulous underwater photographer etc etc. I really admire her. She has just entered the Guiness Book of Records (see Facebook etc for what she has achieved) and also set the new Japanese Lady's Free diving record in Mexico. Terrific. Well Done, Ai! I'm very proud of you!

Ai will be coming to stay with us in March for a short break. Quite a few of you have met her and have followed her achievements. Mandy, who is here now, has met Ai and they have been in communication via Facebook. It's really great to know such a gifted young person and I'm delighted that some of you guys staying with us have met her. (See, I CAN be serious sometimes!!)

Kaw tawn rab su Phuket (Welcome to Phuket)

2011-01-21T22:39:00.000-08:00

Yesterday Mandy and Gary plus Bert the Brick arrived at Phuket airport. The whole idea of staying at my house in Phuket is that guests are prepared to go adventuring. A car is a must (or be prepared to use taxi's). First stop was the car hire firm opposite the airport where Gary picked up his top of the range Toyota Frontier which will carry 6 people with ease.

Tradition (it's Gary's third visit here now) dictates a proper start to the holiday with fireworks and Kom Loi's (fire lanterns). Here are our illustrious adventurers, complete with Mistress-of Ceremonies, Saranwalai Chansongsri, setting off their 'start of adventures holiday Komn Loi's'.

Gary prepares for lift off.
Jai has used local no good semi ex-Pat Whittall as lantern holder while she prepares ignition.

Bert's approach to Kom Loi lift off is furtive to say the least. Difficult to imagine what his holiday wish will be???

Mandy and Jai get ready for lift off!!

It's gonna be a great holiday.....we all just know it!!

The Chards and Bert hit town!

2011-01-21T21:48:00.000-08:00

Gary and Mandy Chard, accompanied by ex-South England Underwater swimming Champion, known professionally as Bert 'the Brick', or to his family as Mr Kevin Manson, plumber, arrived in Bangkok on Thursday. They stayed at the glamorious 5 star hotel Millenium Bangkok Hilton which is on the Chao Praya River running through the centre of the City.

Bangkok's hotels are regarded as the best value in the world by many regular International travellers and indeed boast luxurious interiors, amazing city and river views and superb (really superb!) cuisine. Our friends enjoyed a top quality dinner whilst looking out across the City from the 30th floor of their hotel.

There are plenty of spectacular buildings in Bangkok. A night trip on one of the Chao Praya river boats complete with dinner and a show is a great way to spend an evening. Bangkok may appear a bit daunting but in Thailand...just trust the hotel staff and they will arrange everything with a mini bus arriving to pick you up and take you to your boat and bring you back again. If you try to arrange the tour yourselves, you'll go crazy and probably end up paying more. Thailand knows how to look after tourists.....

Photo below taken looking down from the hotel onto the Night Cruise boats. There are plenty to choose from offering a variety of trips. During the day, the best way to see Bangkok is from the river. You can jump on the local water taxi boats....they are anything up to 100' long... and cruise the river for as little at 17 Baht (40 pence). You can get a little free map which shows you the various 'piers' to get on or off and what sights are available from that pier. If you like to go into the City itself...much better to use Water Taxi's to get you to a pier near the Sky Train system, which is also very cheap, brand new, immaculately clean, safe, punctual...etc etc and far faster than the road taxi service which inevitably grinds to a halt in the never moving traffic jams that Bangkok is infamous for.
Many of the Bangkok hotels boast impressive landscaped grounds for guests to wander around in. Of course, you get what you pay for. You can get a good, clean hotel in the middle of the City on the well known Koa San Road for anything from £7 to £17; or a good 3 star range City Centre hotel for £30. These prices are not per person but per room. For example, the 3 star £30 price is for two people in a massive room with en-suite facilities, sky TV, stocked fridge, coffee making facilities, breakfast, swimming pool etc etc. Very very good value.
If you come to Thailand for your holiday, remember you have easy access to many other nearby countries and parts of Thailand for very little money. For example, Air Asia have return flights from Phuket to Singapore (£45); Chiang Mai, 2nd largest City in Thailand (£50) or even Hong Kong (£120). Cambodia is close by. A trip to the Angkor Wat Temples is a mind blowing experience....and it's just a coach ride away from Bangkok.

There's masses on offer for a holiday you will never forget.

Right now, our visiting Pennys have gone their separate ways. Selena and Kevin have flown to Singapore for a 4 day visit and Colin and Teresa have flown North to Chiang Mai for a week long trip to the North of Thailand including the Golden Triangle (Myanmar, Laos, Thailand) trip. Yesterday they emailed to say they were having an amazing time at the Chiang Mai Aquarium and Zoo.

There's something here for everyone!

2011-01-16T19:52:00.000-08:00

Boys will be Girls and Girls will be Boys...it's a mixed up world.

Here here is...Mr Kevin Lowe. Fresh out of UK and ready to take on the complexities of the Ladyboy Culture here in mad Patong, otherwise known as Dirty City. And, accompanying him on this tour of insanity and gender change is our favourite Sailors Return ex-Barmaid...Selena who is now the Manageress of an Upmarket resturant in Bath.

Mr and Mrs Lowe, charming examples of a well behaved British couple, were looking forward to having a whole new experience. Mr Colin Penny is of course used to people not knowing what sex they are because he is a charter skipper.

Here she is...the glamourous Mrs Lowe, alias Selena Penny......I have a feeling the Ladyboys are going to be extremely jealous of Selena's looks.......ha ha.

Kevin and Father-in Law Colin made friends with a charming young number who they called 'Bob'. Bob had magnificent Bobbets....earned from years of gyrating in a sensual manner down at the old Phuket Bingo Hall for the locals.

Bob became extremely attached to our two adventurers and clung to them...not wishing any other Ladyboys getting into their (deep; VERY deep) pockets.

Meanwhile Selena, Teresa and Jai had dressed up in glamourous gear in the hope of raising a few Bahts before hitting the wild nightlife of Phuket.

Look good, don't they?

The evening started off gently enough...Colin had disappeared into this club by now.....but then it was went seriously downhill as our guests insisted on staying out until 0400...dancing and lashing each other with foam whips in the Devils' Cauldron.

That Lowe/Penny family are serious party goers...our next guests have some wild shoes to fill!!!!!

England V Thailand Fishing Comp

2011-01-16T02:54:00.000-08:00

England V Thailand

Today was the day of the Big Fishing Competition between England and Thailand. England was represented by UK Charterboats Skipper of the Year, Mr Colin Penny...he of the glamorous hairstyle (see Facebook) and owner of the soon to be launched Flamer IV. Representing Thailand was Ocean Master Saranwalai Chansongsri, other wise known as Jai, and Top Crewperson of infamous Charterboat Offshore Rebel.

The scoring opened within seconds of cast off with Colin hitting straight into a Mekong catfish of about 15lb. Colin was pretty impressed with the fighting qualities of this powerful fish but despite the recent memories of the Mr Caines' Facebook posting was able to guide the fish to the net handled by our Thai guide Khun Om.

Mr Penny was top man in the species category with three different species. Here he is with his carp of about 8lb.

And here's the Thai team. Jai never cheats but seemed to have four rods to Colin's one....funny how gals all over the world interpret the rules somewhat differently.

Jai soon retaliated with her own and bigger catfish. In fact Jai went into a commanding lead of 4 fish to England's 1!!!!

Here she is with another of her five fish total catch. The event took place between 0930 to 1230.

Although under considerable pressure from Thailand, Mr Penny was inspired through the motivational teamtalk from the England Manager (me) who told him to get his f**king finger out and stop combing his hair! Charter Captain of the Year Penny responded with the tournament's largest fish...a cracker (another catfish) weighing about 30lb which took a good 20 minutes to coax to the net.

And then.....just like the fabulous species hunter he is......our erstwhile International clinched the species section with this formidably toothed fruit eating pirhana. Colin tempted his third species on an assortment of currants and banana bait presented in a French style croissant squashed onto a swim feeder above a size 1 hook.

Jai made everyone (all three of us) acknowledge her right to represent her Country by nailing the numbers section. Yeah, well it was actually 5 fish each but the England representative played his Wildcard and used the fish his Manager(me again) caught to boost his own total catch.

A rematch has been demanded by both teams which is due to take place tomorrow afternoon........

All in all, this fishing is just amazing. You'd be VERY unlucky

not to catch a big freshwater fish......even I caught two!!!!

Pennys at The Zoo

2011-01-15T03:40:00.001-08:00

The good thing about Phuket zoo for Skipper Colin Penny was finding one of his customers. Amazing how many of our angling lads get out here at this time of the year.

The Happy Family line up for their pre-zoo visit pose. Teresa, Selena and husband Kevin (from Wales!!!) Don't know their mate's name behind them.

Well, we all like different things in life. That's what makes us such a fascinating species for the animals to look at. I have severe problems with such zoos. I want to run around and cut the chains off everything. Seeing a tiger like this doesn't impress me....but then, if it was free it would probably get shot as the Chinese use the bile from the tiger for all sorts of balms and cures....which is why there are so few left in Asia.

Yep, and here's an elephant riding a bike. Mmmmm, not sure I should be writing this particular blog as my totally biased, negative opinion may be coming across.

...but our young guests enjoyed the trip and the pleasure of holding a tiger cub...........

...and feeding the elephants.

And here's some pretty fish.........

There are a couple of excellent nature reserves just to the north of Phuket where small bungalows can be rented amidst the stunning Karst formations, lakes and river. Nature trails take place at the reserve and there the animals roam free. So, if you are a nature and animal lover, there ARE some real treats in store for you here.

Skipper Penny's new command.

2011-01-15T03:19:00.000-08:00

Skipper Penny guides us through the unchartered waters of Pang Gna at the north eastern end of Phuket island.

The scenery in this part of Phuket is stunning. This was our first attempt to learn the area using a combination of local instruction and chartwork. Very good fun for skippers Penny and Whittall using a dinky chart plotter and miniscule GPS numbers. Remember when we had to use those crappy old Valsat 2000D GPS units along with a magnifying glass to read the damn numbers????

Fabulous scenery, eh? Now I have a boat to use we can explore the area properly. There are some very attractive looking secluded beaches, reachable only by private boat. This area would take a lifetime to explore as there are many islands, caves and beaches...it's opened up a whole new frontier! Very exciting.

Here's our boat. It's a 24' Cat built in Australia and was designed as a fast rescue boat. With twin 200HP Mariner outboards, it's a 40 knot rocket...but with the price of fuel in Thailand (yep, it's the same old problem the world over...rocketing fuel prices V thirsty engines) we had to hold back on the throttle. We still blew away £140 worth of petrol...so, although I have use of the boat we will have to cover the cost of our trips. But, with 4 to 6 of us onboard, it's not too bad and lots cheaper than hiring a local speedboat and skipper.

This particular area does not look very fishy. There are a few longtail boats around setting nets but I get the feeling the area has been fished out. This is all about scenery and picnics on pristine sandy beaches......

2011-01-13T00:53:00.000-08:00

Wat Chalong

Wat Chalong is the main temple in Phuket and it is all of 200 yards from the house. It's an amazing temple with plenty to look at. For the past 3 years I have been putting a Guide book together for English speaking people. It's all finished now and the print run actually started today so now, when any of you come, you can take your own booklet....free of charge to our honoured guests...and go and get a good understanding about what the temple (and quite lot of Thai culture) is all about.

The temple has a number of highly decorative buildings. This one is called the Mondop. It's a very busy building with lots of people constantly going in to make offerings to the three revered monks to whom the temple is dedicated. Buddhism is a very easy going and tolerant 'religion'. Anyone is welcome to take part in any aspect of the various rituals that go on....and nobody minds if you take photographs...anywhere within or without any of the buildings. The Thais love photography and certainly don't mind if you take photographs of them..........and they are really good at striking a smiling pose for you. Nice people!!

Here we are at the nearby Big Buddha complex which is an on-going project supported entirely by donations. Thus it will progress at the rate the donations come in. Our intrepid explorers are posing with the Buddha image associated with Saturday. Saturday's Buddha is easily distinguised by the seven headed Naga that guards it. The Buddha is also seated on a Naga........the mythological serpent which is a protective spirit ....when it wants to be!!

Pennys in the Mountains

2011-01-13T00:24:00.000-08:00

The Penny's Day Out

Aha.....UK Charterboats skipper of the Year, Colin Penny and his good lady, Theresa decided on an elephant trek. Here they are ...mounted and looking in complete control of their rampaging monster which is dashing (ha ha) through the jungle terrain on the Naga Mountains just behind the house.

A trip to the monket school is of course essentail. Clever little critters...ride bikes, do press up, play football....and swim under water to retrieve stuff. The main intention of a Thai monkey school is to train the clever things to shimmy up palm trees and chuck the coconuts down to the monkeys waiting below who then stack the coconuts into baskets ready for the workers (people) to lift onto the waiting lorries. A trained monkey is worth a small fortune and is in big demand....much faster, safer and cheaper than employing people to do the dangerous work.

Who needs those lithe, suntanned, dark haired Thai nymphets when there's a proper Weymouth gal (Theresa Penny, no less) to grab hold of at the top of Promthep Point! The Point is one of the main 'sunset viewpoints' and hundreds of visitors flock here every evening to applaud the sun as it goes down. Hmmmm....we'd be applauding the old sun if it ever got up back in UK!!

Aahhh, the young romantics enjoying lunch by the sea at Rawai. A cool sea breeze and shadow offered by the coastal trees...just right for a relaxing break from the sun and heat (ooppps, sorry...there ain't none back home).

2011-01-12T23:55:00.000-08:00

Thai Culture.

OK....so now I have been the proud owner of this house for nearly 3 years. During that time I have gained a bit of insight into Thai culture and I would be the first to admit I do not understand it at all.

During my time here the house prices have risen massively. The house next door is now stupidly priced at 20 million Baht which is about £440,000 with the current crappy value of our declining £. The houses aren't selling....they are too expensive by miles.

So, what is the solution? Well, the obvious one would be to drop the prices considerably to attract buyers. My house cost £140,000 3 years ago so how can an identical one now be three times the price in three years ? Madness.

But what do our Thai friends do???? They get three important monks to come to the Estate and visit the houses that aren't selling. Loads of people connected with the project turn up and they all give loads of food, money and other gifts to the monks who in turn bless the project and suggest ways that things can be improved.

Wait for it................right now, as I write, there are 5 poor little Burmese builders working right under the house next door...burying into the foundations....to find the evil spirit that is supposedly lurking there are bringing bad luck to the house thus preventing its sale!!! When they find it, they have to drag it out....I ain't joking!! The Burmese workers think it's all nuts; the recent potential purchasers think it's madness and I scatch my head in bafflement as I take the poor lads sweating away under the house some water.

Insanity?? East and West Culture...........total opposites!!!

2011-01-09T04:57:00.000-08:00

Day at Pimex Boat Show, Phuket Royal Marina.

Weymouth skippers Penny and Whittall had a new restaurant in Phuket's Royal Marina named in their honour. Here the Internationally unknown skippers were ignored by the crowds as they frantically attempted to attract attention to their lack of importance and to the sign above their heads.

There were a few old bangers inside the exhibition. Jaguar were on display in force with this cheap looking number costing a pathetic £130k. The car, along with the Thai model, were offered as a free gift to skipper Whittall who collapsed into hysterics at the sheer cheek of the obvious backhander.

The bribery for our two Weymouth non-entities didn't stop there. Outside, skipper Penny was being bribed by a £2 million little power boat number and the offer of an instant bride....he of course refused preferring his soon to be launched new vessel, Flamer IV, in Weymouth and a night out at Dorothy's.

Jai was not so easily tricked. She refused all the free gifts being offered to our skippers and splashed out on a brand new craft which will be used for offshore trolling charters starting in February once the craft is fully glued together.

As a final effort to persuade our Weymouth chaps to splash the cash, this rather quaint Gameboat complete with crew was offered for the ridiculously low price of 40 million Baht (£820,000). It costs £2k per day to charter it but four customers can go on at once so that makes it a very reasonable £500 each for a 10 hour trip. Penny and Whittall have now realised they need to match the prices in third world countries and raise their charter prices accordingly. 10 chaps (our boats have much more deck space) at £500 each = £5,000 per day which is about the right sort of price a UK charter angler should reasonably expect to pay. Both skippers apologise for their ridiculously low rates to date.

Boat owners in Phuket Marina do not expect to have to walk far to their boats. Floating patforms are moored alongside an owners pontoon mooring and their car is lowered into place. The owner steps directly onto his boat and goes to sea. Weymouth Harbour need to get a grip and adopt this method so that ageing skippers can be rewarded properly by the local Council for their lifetime of service to the Borough's tourist trade.

This Blog will continue tomorrow once the effects of continuous pleasure in the Land of Smiles have worn off in the warm light of the next Thai dawn.................

2011-01-03T17:10:00.000-08:00

Ali's Boat Diving

After a couple of sessions in the pool, Ali progressed to Kata beach for his first ever dive in the sea. This is a great place to start as the beach slopes very gently down to seven metres. The bottom is sandy with a coral reef running north to south. This reef is packed full of fish life and is a pleasure to dive as novice divers can stay on the sand but follow the reef along giving the benefit of a safe dive with no knee battering plunges onto the coral.... and there's plenty to see. Now we (Steve, Ali, Janey and me) are off to sea to visit two offshore islands for Ali's first boat diving experience.

Ali's first boat dive. I hire a local long-tail boat with Captain Ta Wan for our boat diving. This makes it very cheap (£30 for the day for the boat) and gives us two dives with lunch on an offshore island inbetween dives. Good value....and we have the dive sites completely to ourselves.

Here's Ali's first ever backward roll off the boat.....

There has been a lot of wind and rain in Phuket. The sea has been churned up and the visibility is poor by Thailand's standards. It is starting to get better now....but still not good enough for underwater photography. But none of this matters when you are learning.....your first dives are always full of excitement. There's lots to remember and it's enough to just be in the sea and experiencing those first sensations of being weightless and flying underwater.

2011-01-03T17:08:00.001-08:00